I met this girl on the internet about two months ago and we started to talk on the phone.Well she lives in Kanass and I live in Arizona.She sounds like a good person the type I want be with the rest of my life.We tell each other personal stuff.We even have phone sex and we talked about about meeting each other but neither of us have the money to do so .We want to be together.She told me she loves me and I told her I love her and I met it.It's just that we don't have the money to be to together and I was wondering if you have any suggestions on how we can spice up our relationship over the or on the computer the we can do until we meet.

[Tony T]

A relationship you have over the Internet and on the telephone is JUST THAT...AND NO MORE. You are shooting dice with your feelings here.

Physical chemistry is an essential component of any successful relationship. I URGE YOU to beg, borrow, or steal (no, don't do that) the money necessary to go visit this lady and see her in person. Once a meeting takes place and you both still want the relationship to continue, you have overcome the first hurdle. Then it will be necessary for one of you to move near the other so a conventional courtship can take place.

A conventional courtship is necessary in order to see how you interact in day to day situations. You need to spend physical time together in order to see how that goes.

On the phone, you cannot see someone's facial expressions and body language. Phone sex can be delightful with a sexy voice...but real sex must be fulfilled between two individuals who are genuinely attracted to each other physically.

If the two of you still love each other after spending some real life time together and talking face to face, you've hit the jackpot. In the meantime, those I love yous you speak to each other over the telephone are coming straight from your imaginings.

I'm not the one to suggest ways to spice up your relationship over the phone or Internet because you are really having a relationship in your brain. The complete reality of your relationship with this lady exists in no other place but your brain and you can design it any way you want. It's completely up to you...your imagination is the limit.

But if you fool with your mind and make this to be so much more than it is, you set yourself up for incredible disappointment.

This lady might just be the woman of your dreams...the very best thing that will happen to you in your entire life. But she could also be your worst nightmare (and/or you could be hers).

I know first hand of relationships and marriages that have originated over the Internet and have worked out incredible. The are matches made in heaven. But I have also heard many horror stories...even one girl on America Online who told me she loaned her cyberlove $1,800 and the he changed his screen name and she has never again heard from her.

I know you didn't ask me to rain on your parade but you really sounded like you needed a reality check. I send these words with deepest caring for your feelings and a prayer that it all works out well for you.