Did the lunch thing... now what

kjo314 · 1st February 2006, 12:30 AM

Guys/Gals,

Took the girl out to lunch... lots of laughing and good times... she has a class so we had to cut if short but.... she said she had fun and we should do it again sometime..

I talked to a friend of mine that is in her classes and she said that she is tired of being screwed over and being used.....

We are friends and I had a lot of fun..

Is now the time to ask her on a date and how should I do it??

Any ideas?

kjo314 · 1st February 2006, 11:46 AM

ANyone have any suggestions as to what to do next?

I suck at dating

Groovy · 1st February 2006, 1:40 PM

Ask her what she likes to do in her free time and see what her interests are. She might mention she likes movies, the beach, the gym and then go from there.

alphamale · 1st February 2006, 1:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kjo314

I talked to a friend of mine that is in her classes and she said that she is tired of being screwed over and being used.....

the fact that she is "tired" of being screwed over and being used is a big tip off to something very impt...

whichwayisup · 1st February 2006, 1:52 PM

Ask her what a "perfect" day would be for her. Then re-create it and take her out for that day.

Take things slow. Real slow. You now know that she has been screwed over by afew guys and been used, so show her that she can trust you. That you are not "that" guy from her past.

She may have afew hangups and emotional baggage, so that is why I say take it slowly...

noclobber · 1st February 2006, 3:28 PM

i would suggest that you don't be her friend in the first place. if you are her friend then that's exactly how she will see you and finally when you ask her out she will say "let's not ruin our friendship".

start giving out compliments, flirt with her and give the message that you are interested in becoming more than friends. then ask her out... asap!

mrB2006 · 1st February 2006, 5:47 PM

I'd would recommend 'whichwayisup's idea: take it slow.

However, never go too slow....That was one of the biggest mistakes I had made. If you take it too slow, you become entrenched deep in the friendzone with no escape...Take it from someone who was (and is) there.

MrB

noclobber · 1st February 2006, 6:16 PM

i am not trying to get at you whichwayisup and mrb2006 but in my opinion i think if he takes things slowly he will become her friend and nothing more than that.

women will say "i have been screwed over" and all that... but that doesn't mean you got to move slowly. this is exactly the nice guy's dilemma... he will try to behave very very nicely so that he is not like one of those jerks that the woman complains about... and everybody knows all too well what happens to a nice guy

while he is putting on the best possible and the most nicest behavior she will start dating another guy that "unfortunately" happens to resemble the guys she had dated before...

kjo314 · 1st February 2006, 8:48 PM

Do you think she is interested at all..

kjo314 · 1st February 2006, 8:53 PM

We are only able to talk online..... How do I get to her if that is the only way we talk...

bunch of friends are goin out to a movie tomorrow... should i ask her if she wants to come along?

hyakku · 1st February 2006, 11:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by noclobber

i am not trying to get at you whichwayisup and mrb2006 but in my opinion i think if he takes things slowly he will become her friend and nothing more than that.

women will say "i have been screwed over" and all that... but that doesn't mean you got to move slowly. this is exactly the nice guy's dilemma... he will try to behave very very nicely so that he is not like one of those jerks that the woman complains about... and everybody knows all too well what happens to a nice guy

while he is putting on the best possible and the most nicest behavior she will start dating another guy that "unfortunately" happens to resemble the guys she had dated before...

Woohoo! I'm not the only one who thinks straight. And she might not even be dating jerks, they might just be jerks to YOU, they could be regular guys.

Isn't it funny how EVERY nice guy says that EVERY woman they get friend zoned with go back to "jerks"? I don't even think there are ENOUGH jerks to sustain the amount of women going back to them, so somewhere there might just be confident guys and the nice guys have their nice little game going inside themselves to make themselves feel better than the regular guys because they are nice, respectful, etc, and when they don't get anything back, theres that reliable ol' excuse, "He's just a jerk anyway, she'll figure out soon." Ahh man I love it.

Yea ask her to the movies if you wanna go with her, but don't be so shy, do it and do it confidently.

jerbear · 2nd February 2006, 12:54 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by hyakku

Yea ask her to the movies if you wanna go with her, but don't be so shy, do it and do it confidently.

I agree with hyakku on this one. You've two already introduced, don't think just ask.