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Old 25th January 2006, 9:51 AM   #1
lilmoma1973
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Are you with the wrong person ?



I was listening to G105 this morning and they was giving a list things of whether or not you going to marry or married the wrong person..

1.You think about past sweet hearts that were awesome when with your spouse or s/o

2.Fantasize about others while having sex with your spouse or s/o


3.Find yourself turning your spouse or s/o away when they wanting to cuddle or show affection..

4.Argue about minor things

5.Don't get jealous when your spouse or s/o flirts with the opposite sex..


6.Can't wait till your spouse or s/o leave to go somewhere to get a break from them..

7.Think about what you would do if your spouse or s/o died..

8.Catch yourself thinking about your spouse or s/o and whether you married the right person or going to marry the right person..
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Old 25th January 2006, 10:19 AM   #2
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There's a couple there that I'm really not sure about....

1.You think about past sweet hearts that were awesome when with your spouse or s/o

Fair enough.

2.Fantasize about others while having sex with your spouse or s/o

Hmmm well I don't, but often people do, and I don't think it's necessarily a sign of something wrong... unless it's all the time and they call you the wrong name or something...!!!

3.Find yourself turning your spouse or s/o away when they wanting to cuddle or show affection.

Yep agree!

4.Argue about minor things

Seems a valid point, doesn't make for a happy relationship that's sure!

5.Don't get jealous when your spouse or s/o flirts with the opposite sex..

True, unless you're super confident, this ought to worry you!

6.Can't wait till your spouse or s/o leave to go somewhere to get a break from them..

Well we do all need a break sometimes...!! There times when you're like... can I just get 5 mins peace!! I don't think that's wrong or a sign of a bad relationship.

7.Think about what you would do if your spouse or s/o died..

I thought once about how completely devestated I would be, how it would kill me. It hurt so much I don't even want to contemplate it. Hmmm and that's bad?!!! Surely not. Maybe if you're planning how to spend their life insurance then it's worrying....

8.Catch yourself thinking about your spouse or s/o and whether you married the right person or going to marry the right person

Shouldn't you always contemplate whether you're marrying the right person before you do it? It's like a self check, is the heart ruling the head? Or are you making a really good and thought out decision? Surely you should be sure?!!
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Old 25th January 2006, 10:19 AM   #3
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Quote:
Originally Posted by lilmoma1973

I was listening to G105 this morning and they was giving a list things of whether or not you going to marry or married the wrong person..

1.You think about past sweet hearts that were awesome when with your spouse or s/o

2.Fantasize about others while having sex with your spouse or s/o


3.Find yourself turning your spouse or s/o away when they wanting to cuddle or show affection..

4.Argue about minor things

5.Don't get jealous when your spouse or s/o flirts with the opposite sex..


6.Can't wait till your spouse or s/o leave to go somewhere to get a break from them..

7.Think about what you would do if your spouse or s/o died..

8.Catch yourself thinking about your spouse or s/o and whether you married the right person or going to marry the right person..


1.People reminise sometimes.

2.I'm sure it happens by some people.

3.Could be mad or not in the mood to cuddle.

4.Everyone argues about minor things sometimes.

5.Just because someone doesn't get jealous, doesn't mean they don't care. Could mean they are secure within themselves and relationship. Of course they probably shouldn't be flirting anyway.

6.We all need a break and time to clear our heads sometimes.

7.Never know what may or may not happen or when. I know alot of people who think about this and try to plan ahead in case of something unfortunate.

8.I think some people have questioned this from time to time. Especailly if we have hit a rough patch.




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Old 25th January 2006, 10:29 AM   #4
lilmoma1973
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[quote=lilmoma1973]

I was listening to G105 this morning and they was giving a list things of whether or not you going to marry or married the wrong person..

1.You think about past sweet hearts that were awesome when with your spouse or s/o

No never do that my past sweet hearts were arses!!

2.Fantasize about others while having sex with your spouse or s/o..

I don't do this at all but im sure there are others that do


3.Find yourself turning your spouse or s/o away when they wanting to cuddle or show affection..

I am guilty of this when not feeling good or mad!!

4.Argue about minor things..

I think we all do this from time to time..

5.Don't get jealous when your spouse or s/o flirts with the opposite sex..

Hell yes i do and h says he don't but he does!!


6.Can't wait till your spouse or s/o leave to go somewhere to get a break from them..

Sometimes i like just peace and quiet we all need our time to ourselves..

7.Think about what you would do if your spouse or s/o died..

Yeah i think about this all the time my h works with electrical..

8.Catch yourself thinking about your spouse or s/o and whether you married the right person or going to marry the right person..[/QUOTE
Yeah when we are arguing and mad but then i think i couldn't live without him !! I could but i rather not ..

Last edited by lilmoma1973; 25th January 2006 at 10:31 AM..
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Old 25th January 2006, 10:38 AM   #5
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Just because it's on the radio doesn't mean it came from a good source or that it's useful advice.

I was listening to G105 this morning and they was giving a list things of whether or not you going to marry or married the wrong person..

1.You think about past sweet hearts that were awesome when with your spouse or s/o

Agree if you're finding that your s/o doesn't measure up to them.

2.Fantasize about others while having sex with your spouse or s/o.

Disagree. All the experts say this is normal. However, IMHO if the fantasy is about one of the past loves, then that is a problem.

4.Argue about minor things

Depends. If it's a new phenomenon, it might mean there's an underlying solvable problem.

5.Don't get jealous when your spouse or s/o flirts with the opposite sex..

Again depends. If your s/o flirts jokingly it's different from flirting with intent.

7.Think about what you would do if your spouse or s/o died..

If the idea gives you relief or makes you happy, then yes. If it fills you with grief, obviously not.
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Old 25th January 2006, 10:41 AM   #6
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Quote:
Originally Posted by littlekitty

[B
6.Can't wait till your spouse or s/o leave to go somewhere to get a break from them..[/b]

Well we do all need a break sometimes...!! There times when you're like... can I just get 5 mins peace!! I don't think that's wrong or a sign of a bad relationship.

8.Catch yourself thinking about your spouse or s/o and whether you married the right person or going to marry the right person

Shouldn't you always contemplate whether you're marrying the right person before you do it? It's like a self check, is the heart ruling the head? Or are you making a really good and thought out decision? Surely you should be sure?!!
Well I think #6 is more like, get the **** away from my face or I'm going to explode. Or like with some of my ex's, even hearing them BREATHE would irritate me endlessly.

ANd with #8 I'm thinking it's more like, "whether you married the right person." Which could be argued...in our culture it's fine to do that. We just get divorced. But I would say if you constantly think about whether you are with the right person, you probably aren't.
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Old 25th January 2006, 10:42 AM   #7
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Outcast i didn't say i agree with it .. I just heard and thought it would be interesting to post the questions to see what others thought..
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Old 25th January 2006, 10:44 AM   #8
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Quote:
Originally Posted by blind_otter
Well I think #6 is more like, get the **** away from my face or I'm going to explode. Or like with some of my ex's, even hearing them BREATHE would irritate me endlessly.

ANd with #8 I'm thinking it's more like, "whether you married the right person." Which could be argued...in our culture it's fine to do that. We just get divorced. But I would say if you constantly think about whether you are with the right person, you probably aren't.
Blind i couldn't agree more with you on #8 if you do it all the time than you probably aren't .. I know from time to time when mad at spouse or s/o that we all think that.. I know im guilty of it..
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Old 25th January 2006, 10:50 AM   #9
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Quote:
Originally Posted by blind_otter
Well I think #6 is more like, get the **** away from my face or I'm going to explode. Or like with some of my ex's, even hearing them BREATHE would irritate me endlessly.

ANd with #8 I'm thinking it's more like, "whether you married the right person." Which could be argued...in our culture it's fine to do that. We just get divorced. But I would say if you constantly think about whether you are with the right person, you probably aren't.
Yes very true! I guess it depends alot on how you interpret the questions!!
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Old 25th January 2006, 10:56 AM   #10
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Originally Posted by littlekitty
Yes very true! I guess it depends alot on how you interpret the questions!!

Exactly and im sure there is going to be major conflict going on!! I shouldn't have posted it wasn't trying to make noone mad, just wanted to see what others would say..
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Old 25th January 2006, 11:10 AM   #11
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Originally Posted by lilmoma1973
Exactly and im sure there is going to be major conflict going on!! I shouldn't have posted it wasn't trying to make noone mad, just wanted to see what others would say..
No, i think it's interesting to debate actually.

It goes to show that people (the radio show, not you! ) often put out 'generic' advice like this, but it's not always helpful or useful.

As we can see here people interpret the questions differently and put a different slant on things from their own POV.

Interesting to see already how people interpret the questions based on thier own history etc.

Plus a bit of healthy debate never hurt anyone...!
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Old 25th January 2006, 11:14 AM   #12
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Originally Posted by littlekitty
No, i think it's interesting to debate actually.

It goes to show that people (the radio show, not you! ) often put out 'generic' advice like this, but it's not always helpful or useful.

As we can see here people interpret the questions differently and put a different slant on things from their own POV.

Interesting to see already how people interpret the questions based on thier own history etc.

Plus a bit of healthy debate never hurt anyone...!

That is why i made it cause the radio said that if you answer yes to any you are with the wrong person.. This was my point of posting it.. Yeah be interesting to what others thought and i have a few in mind can't wait to see what they think ..
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