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Read this letter from <THE> ABUSER!!!
Okay I gotta get this off my chest. He left these on my car at my mom's house after not getting through to me on the phone or driving by my car at work...
(Okay I'm spelling this as he spells--he's semi-illiterate)
"I love you. Sometimes I have a hard time showing you. But for the last two day I know Im missing you bad. If you are done whit me I will understande. But Im in love with you I will change my way of thinking I promass you that. Your all I won't. Your my life. I miss you I miss you bad. Please call me soon. I will make this up to you. every day of my life. Just give me one more day, week, year, life time you pick I pick life time comitmont. I wish you could believe me. Just one more shot at being your man. I will not let you down ever again. for I love you. And I take all the bad things that as happen to us and put them in the closet. I wont to start over write now. Please think about it and let me know how you feel about this. Love you with my hole body and mind. your it for me."
Next one:
" I'm so sorry for the pain I've costed you. I can't be with out you. I feel emptey in side. I can't sleep or eat. I know your not coming home and that is killing me. So now I can see how not to treat a woman. But now will you let me show you how I can make you feel like a woman. For you will never be in the dark anymore about anything. for I will be open to you about everything from this point on. I need you in my life. Please give me one more chance at this please. I miss you. I will do what ever it takes to show you this. let me do it please. I can make you happy just let me: I see clearer then ever in the passed. Call me I need you in my live."
I'm happy I recieved this note, only because I know that he suffers--or at least pretends to. Quick recap: I'm 7 months pregnant with his baby, he locks me out of the house, dissapears all night, calls me all sorts of nasty names, drags me out of bed by my hair throws keys at me, pours gallons of milk on my head, and makes me sleep in my car in -5 degree weather.
That said, he lied to me about his ex who he has been talking to our entire relationship, even visiting, the thing is she is 20 years my senior and nasty looking as hell. He had this big issue with me because I was young and attractive and felt he had to "guard me" from other men, which almost drove him insane...enough to have an 80 mile an hour suicide race and sit in his car in the garage to get carbon monoxide poisoning. Anyway he still remains in contact with her, and I left him last week.
But he always seems to return, with a note, sounding nothing like him at all, he'd never say I love you in real life. Plus he put cologne on it OMG, gimme a break.
Give me strength to resist, because the person who wrote these notes is not the person I know (other than the spelling problem).
BTW he started his second therapy appointment because he wants to change...but sometimes too late is too late, right?
Tell me am I being fair?????
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