In Search Of...Having a hard time forming friendships or finding companions, lovers, or associates? Is someone pursuing an unwelcome relationship with you? Talk about your experiences here.
girls have you ever had this type of relationship with a guy? how do you classify it?
I dont know how to explain what kind of relationship this is.
But i've been seeing this girl for about 2 months so far....
Anyway our personalities are very similar, and we have a great deal in common that we understand each other so well, that we know each other's thinking and wants.
usually i speak to her everyday, but i havent spoken to her for these past few days. And yesterday online, all of a sudden she asked "did you miss me?", i asked her back , she said kind of and i said a little bit....which is strange cause she never asked this.
eventually we were asking each other questions, about how we felt about each other and what this relationship is. Neither of us could explain what it is, because it feels like a friendship and a bf/gf thing (we do things that couples do), yet we arent exclusive so you could say its casual. It's laid back and there are no arguments that come along with commited relationships. So being unable to categorize it, we just label each other as friends...(we're not sex buddies, well we only did it 1x)
I dont know she keeps saying im the "perfect guy", and asked me some other questions such as if i like having her my side...or if i like cute/sexy better. or if i got into a LTR with another girl, would we still be friends? She got a little worried when i mentioned perhaps cutting contact if that happens.
it's weird and cool how we always end up being on the same page of things.
Sounds to me like there could be fear of commitment, because well...when ppl breakup sometimes they dont even keep in contact. She mentioned friends are forever....so im thinking she wants me in her life yet is afraid to lose me if we ever got commited and not work out. So with time who knows how this will unravel...
girls, have you ever had a similar situation with a guy? And how did it turn out between both of you?
Last edited by Mydish1; 10th January 2006 at 12:12 PM..
From everything you just wrote, it sounds like you have landed squarely in the friends zone. Sorry, but unless you do something to shake it up (pull back a little, don't be so available and don't be so willing to listen to all of her girl stuff) you will probably stay there. Women will give up a friend if they really like a guy. You won't like being her girlfriend.
Hi: good morning. I have a few more things to say about relationship. If you really wonated a friendship only than was not the best thing; even tho it happened once! She might say some thing different; you might be giving her mixed messages; it sounds like a lustful relationship that turned in to infatuation. I would like to know why did you sleep with her? Make shore you give her clear signals; so she can decide whether you would like to have a friendship, be her boy friend, her companion, be intimate and a long term meanful relationship that could lead to marriage. Besides you only know her for two months so you can not make to many phone calls, otherwise you will not have something to talk about later on in the relationship. She might not be the one for you, so take your time and get to know her before taking the next step. God bless you. take care.
Hi: good morning. I have a few more things to say about relationship. If you really wonated a friendship only than was not the best thing; even tho it happened once! She might say some thing different; you might be giving her mixed messages; it sounds like a lustful relationship that turned in to infatuation. I would like to know why did you sleep with her? Make shore you give her clear signals; so she can decide whether you would like to have a friendship, be her boy friend, her companion, be intimate and a long term meanful relationship that could lead to marriage. Besides you only know her for two months so you can not make to many phone calls, otherwise you will not have something to talk about later on in the relationship. She might not be the one for you, so take your time and get to know her before taking the next step. God bless you. take care.
i had a relationship with a guy that had those qualities--but he never took it to the next level so we stayed friends. If that's what you want keep it casual and don't have sex. If you have sex she will bond more and more probably. If you see her as more as a friend then perhaps you need to change your behavior.
Take it from a girl this girl sounds like she is just keeping you around as her backup guy incase she gets lonely and needs somebody to fall back on. She does not want to make it serious with you in case something better comes along. Just settle with the fact that you still have your friendship and don't think about the other part anymore unless she reveals true feelings for you@!
Good morning again: yes sex makes it more complacated and besides what is the rush anyway you might get her pregnant and who won'ts that.
Quote:
Originally Posted by cygny
i had a relationship with a guy that had those qualities--but he never took it to the next level so we stayed friends. If that's what you want keep it casual and don't have sex. If you have sex she will bond more and more probably. If you see her as more as a friend then perhaps you need to change your behavior.
Hi: good morning. I have a few more things to say about relationship. If you really wonated a friendship only than was not the best thing; even tho it happened once! She might say some thing different; you might be giving her mixed messages; it sounds like a lustful relationship that turned in to infatuation. I would like to know why did you sleep with her? Make shore you give her clear signals; so she can decide whether you would like to have a friendship, be her boy friend, her companion, be intimate and a long term meanful relationship that could lead to marriage. Besides you only know her for two months so you can not make to many phone calls, otherwise you will not have something to talk about later on in the relationship. She might not be the one for you, so take your time and get to know her before taking the next step. God bless you. take care.
Actually at that time we both wanted to sleep with each other, well she invited me over and things took its course. She had not given me clear signals from the start, but presently things are very clear now.
Quote:
i had a relationship with a guy that had those qualities--but he never took it to the next level so we stayed friends. If that's what you want keep it casual and don't have sex. If you have sex she will bond more and more probably. If you see her as more as a friend then perhaps you need to change your behavior.
i wouldnt mind the sex. But you could say she's a smart girl and chooses not to have sex.
Quote:
Take it from a girl this girl sounds like she is just keeping you around as her backup guy incase she gets lonely and needs somebody to fall back on. She does not want to make it serious with you in case something better comes along. Just settle with the fact that you still have your friendship and don't think about the other part anymore unless she reveals true feelings for you@!
She probably is keeping me around as backup in case if something better does come along. But after my week long trip, i realized im cool with being friends with her (even if we may kiss and such). Altho the week before i left, i asked if she liked being with me she said yes. And i said i wasnt ok with being just friends, and its best if we cut contact. she got all worried and couldnt fall asleep.
But now i know im not into her like that, or you could say i lost attraction for her. But regardless im alright with the way things are. But a part of me knows she will try to cockblock(not literally sex but you know) me if other women come across my path....
Actually at that time we both wanted to sleep with each other, well she invited me over and things took its course. She had not given me clear signals from the start, but presently things are very clear now.
i wouldnt mind the sex. But you could say she's a smart girl and chooses not to have sex.
She probably is keeping me around as backup in case if something better does come along. But after my week long trip, i realized im cool with being friends with her (even if we may kiss and such). Altho the week before i left, i asked if she liked being with me she said yes. And i said i wasnt ok with being just friends, and its best if we cut contact. she got all worried and couldnt fall asleep.
But now i know im not into her like that, or you could say i lost attraction for her. But regardless im alright with the way things are. But a part of me knows she will try to cockblock(not literally sex but you know) me if other women come across my path....
That is good that you and her decide to be friends; but next time state what you are looking for in a girl up front. I know my male frinfriend is looking for more than just a friendship: he is looking for romance.
That is good that you and her decide to be friends; but next time state what you are looking for in a girl up front. I know my male frinfriend is looking for more than just a friendship: he is looking for romance.
its pretty obvious what i was looking for, we kissed on the first date and all the other dates after that. However she only stated her intentions after a month (intention of being friends) instead of at the start. But she knows doing that in the beginning will only scare me off, so instead she chose to lead me on. she didnt even tell me she had a bf until almost a month later!
as for your situation....thats why i dont believe opposite sex friendships can work out 100%, as the friendship is usually 1-sided. While the other person has attraction for the other, and hopes to get into his/her pants someday (or at least keep it a hidden agenda)
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Hi: good morning. I have a few more things to say about relationship. If you really wonated a friendship only than was not the best thing; even tho it happened once! She might say some thing different; you might be giving her mixed messages; it sounds like a lustful relationship that turned in to infatuation. I would like to know why did you sleep with her? Make shore you give her clear signals; so she can decide whether you would like to have a friendship, be her boy friend, her companion, be intimate and a long term meanful relationship that could lead to marriage. Besides you only know her for two months so you can not make to many phone calls, otherwise you will not have something to talk about later on in the relationship. She might not be the one for you, so take your time and get to know her before taking the next step. God bless you. take care.
We have some thing in common/similar .
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