[crystal m]

My husband had what I believe to be an emotional affair with an older woman (see my post "husband calling older woman on cell phone" over on the infidelity threads). Hubby still says that they were just friends but after him lying to me so much about her and covering up i'm having a hard time getting over it. What hurts me the most is all the lies he told to cover up their "relationship". Said he lied cause he knew I would not approve of them talking on the cell phones. Anyway, how do I get over this? I want to forgive him so much but I just cant. Has anyone here delt with their spouse having an EA? If so how did you get over it? Oh and get this, hubby actually wants me to meet this woman! Right now I feel like if I saw her I would probably puke first and then punch her lights out. He said she is a really good friend and i would like her if I just gave her a chance. He wants me to get 4 tickets to a concert so we can all go together (me, hubby, her and her boyfriend). I do not believe that I can do this. I'm so hurt and crushed by all this. And hubby does not see why I'm making such a big deal of this. I really do want to get past it, but it seems like not a day goes by that I wonder if they really were "just friends"
Please Help!

[brashgal]

I read your other post. This is a tough one. My ex cheated with a coworker's wife for over a year before I discovered their affair. We often socialized, our kids, their kids so it seemed natural that they talked or he would lie and say he was talking to his coworker.

In my situation what was different was that her husband was not told what was going on (at least not by me). In your situation, she knows you suspect something is happening AND her BF thinks you suspect something is happening. Unless they have an open marriage and are really good liars, I don't think they'd want to go out with you on a double date.

You might benefit from some individual counselling - it helps to talk this out and get a professional opinion.

As long as you are so upset, I don't think it's a good idea to go out with this couple in the near future.