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how do i move on when were on a break?

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Breaks and Breaking Up It happens to most everyone at some point in life! Share your experiences!

Old 2nd January 2006, 4:24 PM   #1
Darla doll
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Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: California
Posts: 6
how do i move on when were on a break?

okay, this might get confusing.
I met this guy about a year ago and we really liked each other. We never "went out" but we kinda dated and then he started being really weird and after a date, call me and tell me he was moving away and it'd just be best if we never talked again. Then 2 days later he'd call me up and ask me out again. Being down right stupid and clueless i'd go out with him again. But this got REALLY old really quick! so I decided to stop contact with him completly.
I started to hang out a lot with another close guy friend who was trying to help me get over this other guy. to make a long story short me and him started dating. (bad mistake)
The first guy found about it and started to call me CONSTANTLY. I finally told him to go to hell. But one night he left a message on my machine saying he saw how i looked in my boyfriend's eyes and he knew i didn't love him. (he was kinda right)
well, i broke up with my boyfriend because it didn't seem right. I broke his heart. Then to make things worse I started seeing the first guy everywhere. We started to talk and i explained why i'd stop talking to him and everything else. We started dating (actually dating this time) and then bam! He asks me out on a date one night and tells me he wants a break. okay... but he loves me and we'll get back together. okay... i'm so sick of this crap now that i'm just trying to get over him. But i still love him and now it's like we might get back together? I dont know. He told my friend we're on a "five-year break" sorry but that's something a little kid would say isn't it?
I want sooo badly to just get over him and move on, but I think he's made things worse by not making it a clean break and leaving hope, but that's just like him. He works at the bank so it's kind of hard not to see him. I just cant stop thinking what i did wrong. I kept asking if he has another girl but he swears he doesnt (to be truthfully honest, i believe him..he's not the hottest guy on the block...(I liked his personallity..guess im not the best at reading people))
My other ex is now talking to me, but there's just no chemistry, he's a great guy and he'll treat me right ( any single ladys?) but he's just not for me. How do call it quits and forget about this looser?
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Old 11th January 2006, 10:38 AM   #2
greyhound
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Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: New England
Posts: 16
Can you say control issues??

Hi Darla Doll. This is interesting and ohh so common. It sounds to me like he is "getting off" by keeping you on a string. He gets reassurance that you still care and then off he goes again. I recently ended a similar relationship where I was the recipient of this. I would go back to no contact. Perhaps you can do your banking at the ATM?? As for guy #2, be honest. Tell him that you would still like to see him as a friend, but the attraction isn't there?? I have numerous female, in some cases lifelong, friends that I have no pretenses about a romantic relationship. And the friendships really work. But if guy #2 says he can't handle this, then move on. I know i'm on the outside looking in and that both of these actions are probably going to be "painful", but being "yanked" is even more painful. I say this from experience and wish you the best of luck!!
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"Every day you make progress, every day may be fruitful. yet there will stretch out before you an ever-lengthening, ever-ascending, ever-imposing path. You know you will never get to the end of the journey. But this, far from discouraging, only adds to the joy and glory of the climb"
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