[Somebodysomewhere]

I feel like I am under a rock and I can't lift it to get out . I have an ex husband that remarried a year or so ago. We have two teen children from our marriage. The kids father and his new wife spend days on end degrading me and my parenting of the kids. They have my 16 year old daughter so upset she is hysterical during phone calls from them. They say they are going to court, or calling the Department of Social services. They say I am a "mental case" a "sycho" whatever comes to mind. they degrade her. I want her to cease contact with them she won't she loves her dad. Most of the problem is with the new wife. but the father lets her do it and has his own say as well.

They are ruining our otherwise good life. we have normal teen issues, but we get through them. I work hard to make my kids happy. I am now constantly feeling inadequete, there phone callse go on several times a month. The new wife (who has no children) cuts at me with statements that are bogus I know but I'm feeling so stressed, today it happened and I got physically sick. I don't want my daughter or myself to go through this anymore. I need legal help but I can't afford it and if I could what would I do? What is this considered? I wish I never had to lay eyes on them again. but I have two more years, before that's even a prayer.

[Lishy]

Screw legal help - Get a backbone and tell her to mind her own fking business

Unless there are genuine concerns, she has no right to involve herself with YOUR kids. Tell her to take a running jump!!!!!!!!!!!!

[slubberdegullion]

First thing you need to do is take the emotion out of the equation. You're all upset - and I don't blame you, frankly - but in such a state you won't be thinking clearly.

Make copious notes; dates, times, length of call, quotes if you can (if you can tape the conversations, that may help - little pocket recorders with phone adapters are available at pretty much any place that sells electronic gizmos) and write them down.

Tell them, clearly and directly, that this abuse ends immediately. If they say something like, "Well, what are you gonna do about it?" you don't have to answer. Just repeat: "This abuse ends immediately. Do not call anymore with degrading or derogatory comments to me or my children."

That won't stop them, of course, but if this proceeds further you have made it clear to them that you want no part of their abuse.

Once you have made your notes - and you'll have to gather substantial evidence, one or two calls won't do - take the notes to the police and file a harassment complaint.

[sparticuss]

Ahh tis so different, and yet so much the same , when the boots on the other foot.
Mother's quite deliberiately poision their kids minds against their ex,s before access visits so that the access visit will be a flop.
It isn't hard to convince a young kid that a loving father has somehow metamorphised into some sort of monster.

But this is all child abuse and illegal. If this woman is harrassing your daughter then contact BOTH the police and the social welfare mobs. The childrens protection lot. They pull a surprising amount of clout.