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So, my ex broke up with me almost 7 weeks ago. The first week I did make a fool of myself, calling, emailing him constantly. After the first week, we talked once again and he said that his decision was final. He hasn't called me ever since and I haven't called him either.

After that I thought I was doing really great, my friends were very proud of me for being that strong. I even started working on my research and I was able to concentrate on things other than him.

But then! about a week ago, I started seeing him in my dreams every single night. Now, I am a mess again, cannot do anything but think about him and the old times.

I've started to believe that there is this cycle, you feel really bad, then start feeling better and then again back to day 1 of the break up. Do you guys feel the same way, or is it just me stuck in this vicious cycle?

[Craig]

"or is it just me stuck in this vicious cycle?"

You're normal, textbook case actually. It sucks but you'll get better.

[CaliGuy]

Yep, it happens to me too. You just have to remember that it's for the best, you don't need him in your life, you'll be fine and there will be someone else for you. I promise, there always is.

[lindya]

W\, / <------ symbol's progress
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It's a bit like looking at the graph of a stock's movement over a period of several months. Your ex breaking up with you was like a terrible set of results come out causing the price/mood to plummet. Over a period of weeks (or months) the lows will be tested out a few times. However, you're an essentially sound organisation who just hit a rocky patch. Once confidence returns, as the graph demonstrates, there will be a strong recovery. Friends who invest time and effort in you during the lows will be glad they hung in there when they end up scoring good dividends.

Oh for ****'s sake - what went wrong with my graph?!

[symbol]

Thank you all for replies. It's good to know that I am at least on track!

And lindya, thanks for the graph. I am doing a Ph.D. in economics, so the graphs made it a lot easier for me to understand the path of recovery!

Cheers.

S.

[symbol]

It hurts so much. I haven't cried for a long time but now it started again. I don't want to do anything. Nothing seems meaningful.

I don't even know what I am feeling. Is it anger, sadness, disappointment or what?

And I feel so lonely.

I was supposed to go to a friend's place for dinner but I called it off. I just want to go home and stay alone.

When will all this end?

[CaliGuy]

Staying at home alone is the last thing you should do. The absolute best thing you can do when you are depressed about someone is get a lot of excercise (every day) and hang out with friends or make new ones.

Sitting at home sulking will only serve to keep you down longer.

I'm going snowboarding on Mon/Tue with friends. There's sure to be some great looking women there too so hey, how knows, maybe I will meet someone new???

[symbol]

Originally Posted by CaliGuy

Sitting at home sulking will only serve to keep you down longer.

I feel that trying to forget the pain is just like a game I am playing with myself. Throughout the day I am most of the time cheerful, but then it is not real. Isn't this just ignoring my own feelings?

[CaliGuy]

Originally Posted by symbol

I feel that trying to forget the pain is just like a game I am playing with myself. Throughout the day I am most of the time cheerful, but then it is not real. Isn't this just ignoring my own feelings?

Fake it till you make it comes to mind. But again, it's hard to stop the ex from creeping into your mind when you're sitting at home alone. Either go exercise or go hang out with friends. Don't sit at home sulking.

[symbol]

Originally Posted by CaliGuy

Either go exercise or go hang out with friends. Don't sit at home sulking.

Thanks for the advice Caliguy. I think I will go to that dinner tonight. It will keep my mind away from my stupid ex.