It just hit me today. I have only had three serious relationships my whole life, and outside of those three, I have never dated someone more than once. Basically it struck me that I have been totally non-selective about the women in my life. Basically, if I was attracted enough to a woman to ask them out, and they showed any interest in return, they ended up being a long-term relationship. Out of the three, only once was I in love (she dumped me after 1 1/2 years). The other two lasted 15 years, and 1 1/2 years to women that I was not even in love with!

Gosh, maybe I should try being selective at least to the point of being in love with someone before committing to a long-term relationship.

[JayKay]

Sounds like you liked the security. Maybe that was enough for you for a long time.

Now it seems you are re-assessing what's important to you. If 'being in love' is a priority, then by all means, do find someone you feel that way about before committing.

I think a lot of people value security and safety over passion...