[BrwnEyz13]

Hey, im posting this b/c i feel so confused right now about a fellow coworker. We r both 18 and work in a clothing store. We both worked over the summer and got scheduled together a lot. Now that im back in school she started to miss me and i started to miss her (I only work 2 days a week as opposed to all week). We'd both look foward to seeing eachother during our shifts and be sad if we didn't get to work togetehr. When we did work together there was this chemistry and we'd get a long so well. She'd say things like "I love working with you", "I miss you" and lean on my shoulder, stare at me (i noticed every time i looked up) and flat out flirt w/ me. As far as this flirting goes, it all starts w/ one of saying a sarcastic comment and it progresses from there. At one occasion, she even convinced my boss not to send me home b/c she wanted to spend time w/ me. Then i recently noticed a change. She isn't as responsive to the flirting, and i usually have to start the conversations. Now she seems a lil bit cold toward me... i mean she'll acknowledge me and say hi but thats it. I noticed this after she showed up to work a lil drunk about a month ago. She was invited by another coworker (guy) to get some drinks after work and she never told me if she went or not. So she was acting like she normally does that night and i show up the next day to recieve this cold treatment... i figured she had a hangover so i let it go. But now its carried on for the past month!! The reason i never confronted her about this is b/c she has a boyfriend. Yes we flirted a lot knowing that she has a boyfriend. It started as a friendly work relationship of teasing then it escalted to this. And now shes cold toward me. Maybe something happened between her and my other coworker or maybe not, but all i know is that after that night she completely changed. And now im so freggin confused and frustrated. Your insight would be deeply appreciated thank you

[magda]

It seems likely that she has either gotten involved with your other co-worker or she is trying to make things work with her boyfriend. Maybe your co-worker told her something negative about you that she believes. Either way she is telling you loud and clear that she doesn't want to flirt anymore. You can just ask her why she's gotten so cold.

[BrwnEyz13]

yeah, ill bring it up next time i work w/ her.... i just hope i can muster enough courage to do so wish me luck thanx for your input. Right now im just afraid of losing her friendship and making things at work akward. I wantto have a relationship with her but everyone says its a bad idea to have one b/c we r coworkers and adding onto the fact that she has a bf. But its a risk im willing to take though....

[Yamaha]

I would ask her "what is the problem?" If she feels different now about you then at least you would like to know. People usually don't change for no reason. She has a reason for treating you cold. You just need to find out what it is.

[NYCmitch25]

This is rich, you think you need help with her but you really need help pulling your head out of your own ass. Trying to follow this drivel was hard enough and what I barely got out of it was that you are upset because you can't flirt with a slutty chic who has a boyfriend. More than that, she might be seeing the other co-worker and you're jealous. This chic is obviously some kind of messed up bi-polar father figure seeker, it would be in your best interest to find someone else to boost your ego...



man, I should have been born British...

[Neptune]

Look out my friend, your good buddy coworker may have went for the jugular and pulled out the " I know for sure that BrwnEyz13 is a fag routine".

All is fair in love and war you know

Hey, I`m not kidding here and it is a strong possiblity that he has said something derogatory to her.

You need to get it out of her

[BrwnEyz13]

i dont hang around her to boost my ego, i would never use neone to boost my ego and sorry for the long dribble lol. The more i look back on it, the more i see that i am feeling this way b/c i miss how much fun we had at work. Now its just boring at times... I dont see myself persuing a bf/gf relationship w/ her b/c she has a bf already and i understand that; i try not to cross lines that i shouldn't. The part that im most confused about is her different treatment of me after that night with the other coworker. Now i don't know if she went with him, and most likely did, but the only way i can find out y she is treating me this way is to ask her. Thanx for the advice guys and thnx for the tough love, NYCmitch25. But wut i wont tolerate is u calling her those names b/c u dont know her like i do, and to be honest w/ u i dont know her that well either (6 months as a coworker), but she doesn't deserve that, imo no one does.

edit: Should i persue a friendly relationship or stick w/ a coworker relationship?

[Yamaha]

Should i persue a friendly relationship or stick w/ a coworker relationship?

Lete her dictate your relationship and follow her lead.