[masaki1085]

I have been dating a girl somewhat long-distance for the past two months. We met a long time ago, and caught up at a party at the end of last summer, and from there we started hitting it off--we had been talking everyday and we hung out once or twice before I asked her out on a date, and from that point it had become a relationship.

She goes to school an hour away from where I go to school, and we live in the same hometown. We both graduate in December, and she is taking 24 credit hours at her school... she is really busy.

Lately we have been seeing each other less often (than say 1-2 week periods of time) because of her schoolwork. Often we will make tenative plans and she will break them because of her work. I am totally understanding of this, and I believe that her schoolwork comes first before anything. But I do admit that this aspect can be extremely frustrating at times.

She also seems to act in cycles. At times she seems so stressed out over school that nothing seems to phase her, including our relationship. She doesn't seem excited to see me, and she doesn't get disappointed when plans are broken or we cannot meet. When she notices that she is being distant, she will often feel bad, and tell me this. And maybe for a day or two, she will act more affectionate and understanding until the cycle repeats itself again.

Earlier this month, there was a time when she was extremely affectionate; I was coming to see her, and she was practically ready to jump me (in the good way). About a day or two after this, she began her distance part of her cycle again, as schoolwork began to pile up. And the cycle ran its course throughout the month. She cancelled a date coming to see me, but we made plans to hang out during our Thanksgiving break.

On our Thanksgiving break, we hung out, but she was being as distant as distant can be. It was really strange. I also was trying to get together one more time with her amidst her schoolwork, in which all we could get in was an hour breakfast the day that we both had to go back. I brought all of this to her attention, and she admits that it is her, but this is the way that she perceives it: In her mind, she processed that because I wanted to hang out with her during break, I was being "pushy," and when she feels pushed, she will become distant and reclusive. Keep in mind, and she admits, that this is all in her head--I am NOT being pushy. I have actually been extremely patient in this whole process due to her credit hour load.

When I discussed this with her, she also told me she was "bad at dating." I don't even know what to say to that.

Since I talked to her yesterday about this, I have been in a terrible mood. I have been mad at her. I have not been excited to see her next (usually I am) or talk to her next. I have been feeling bitter. I fear for the next cycle. And I don't know what she is going to be like after school is done and we are home after we've graduated and she is less busy. I fear that these cycles will continue for other reasons.

A part of me still likes her and wants to keep dating her. Another part of me just wants to throw my hands up and quit, especially if she will not even try and just give me a cop out excuse like she is "bad at dating."

I think for awhile I am just going to stay some distance and she how she reacts, since she feels that I am being pushy; other than this, I don't know what to do and I am concerned about the mindset I am in. Does anyone have any advice about my situation?

Thanks so much! I know this was a long read.