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daughter,14yrs,has bi-polar and cuts

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Old 22nd November 2005, 10:50 AM   #1
volunteer
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daughter,14yrs,has bi-polar and cuts

I'm trying to find some support here hoping that someone else can relate, maybe having a child with bi-polar. She has been a cutter now for about 6 month, and it is very hard to deal with. I've tried to get support from my area, but people here don't understand. I wish everyone well here on these forums, and I'll have everyone in my prayers. Thanks for reading, and I hope to find someone who relates.
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Old 22nd November 2005, 11:59 AM   #2
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you and your family have my prayers~ this is not an easy subject to deal with, a cyber friend of mine has dealt with the issue in the past, though she's stopped cutting for about six months now. From conversations with her, I wonder if cutters do this because a low sense of self-worth, that no matter what you tell them or how much you admire, love or appreciate them, they think they're unlovable and worthless.

do a web crawl on cutting or self-mutilation, you'll possibly find a resource close to you to help your family through this. Also, line her up with psychiatric counselling (if you already haven't) to help keep her bipolar state on a more even keel -- this could be what is behind the cutting.

know that there is no shame in seeking help or counselling, and that getting on medication is very much like making sure your car's fluid levels are where they need to be to keep it running smoothly.

hugs,
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Old 22nd November 2005, 1:01 PM   #3
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Hi there,

I can relate I have been dx'd bi-polar since the age of 4 or so and I am 27 now. I am not a cutter but I know of a place that you may get some much needed help or release. PM me and I will let you know.

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Old 24th November 2005, 3:00 AM   #4
Bobbie
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I have bipolar 1

but have never cut myself.

When I was a social worker kids who self-mutilated were either sexually abused or had some underlying major family issue(s) going on which caused extremely poor self-image and attention-seeking which I guess could be called 'para-suicidal'.

It may not be what you want to hear- but you need to look at your family dynamics and see as an outsider if possible what is going on.

Don't be afraid to address issues if your daughter's problem is with you- you are not to blame or a bad parent in any way.

It's just a faulty family system maybe which you can adjust to and help your family?

If you are already angry or flinching from what I have written- maybe this is part of the problem, children who self-mutilate feel they cannot verbally express emotions, they have decided the only way for them to release their emotions is by internalising their pain but via the outlet of self-injury:because
it is visible if anyone cares to see it..but otherwise invisible and not 'trouble-making'....
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Old 25th November 2005, 1:08 PM   #5
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I am so sorry about this. I hope you can find the help she needs. Have you tried calling HHS(health and human services)?


My sister is bi-polar but she does not cut, she over medicates herself. She has been pulled over twice in the last two or three months for driving recklessly. Every time I talk to her I want to just cry. She is always so doped up. She is 45 and has lived w/ this for her whole life but just got diagnosed w/ it about a year or two ago.

I hope your daughter can get the help she needs.
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Old 25th November 2005, 1:51 PM   #6
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Volunteer, where are you located (geographically)? I have access to a database of mental health professionals that may be of some use. PM me if you prefer.
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Old 26th November 2005, 2:33 AM   #7
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Quote:
Originally Posted by volunteer
I'm trying to find some support here hoping that someone else can relate, maybe having a child with bi-polar. She has been a cutter now for about 6 month, and it is very hard to deal with. I've tried to get support from my area, but people here don't understand. I wish everyone well here on these forums, and I'll have everyone in my prayers. Thanks for reading, and I hope to find someone who relates.
Labeling a child of fourteen is a very dangerous thing. When a child is labeled by a medical professional that child will often begin to act out that label.

It is possible that your daughter is cutting for other reasons than being mentally ill. Be sure that not all possibilities have been overlooked. In my opinion, cutting is a very common behavior for most teenagers these days.

Did you know that the criteria used for diagnosing bipolar disorder is intended to be used for adults aged at least eighteen? Do you know how easy it is for bipolar disorder to be misdiagnosed in teenagers? If you have the time I suggest doing some research on the topic.

Do not overlook the possibility of problems at home, at school, with friends, or with a boyfriend.

If you truly believe that your daughter is a risk to herself, the only way to be certain she will be safe is to admit her to a mental hospital.

Just be sure and be as informed as you can be. I was misdiagnosed as a teenager and the experience nearly ruined my future.
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Old 26th November 2005, 2:58 AM   #8
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My best friend cuts herself, she started when she was 13, now shes 15. My friend does it whenever she's really upset about something. Her mom getting involved seemed to make her even angrier, but she could of been doing it for attention. I dont know about your daughter, but putting my friend on medications made her worse. The doctors say she's bipolar, but i dont think so. And the thought of going to an institution made her crazy, but if you really think she needs to for her safety than it might be the only way. Make sure she really is bipolar or it could mess her up even more. She's a teenager and she gets way more emotional about any issue regarding school, a boyfriend, or something at home. My friend mostly cuts when her mom hits her, but some other times its because of a boyfriend.
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Old 26th November 2005, 1:26 PM   #9
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i know a young girl online who cuts herself and tries to stop but cant. she goes to a forum where they talk about it. here is the link:

http://www.facetheissue.com/communit...splay.php?f=15

perhaps if you read some of the threads there you can get a feel for some of the thoughts your child may be thinking .
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Old 24th December 2005, 9:51 PM   #10
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My daughter began cutting when she was 14 and it was due to family issues, her father and I had separated and were divorcing. But together we came together and got her care. Her escalated to suicide attempt, but then after many years, she seemed to get a positive outlook. Her high school senior year was her best, but then she went down hill, eventually pulling out of college, and can't hold a job. As an adult (18+) she has decided she no longer wants pills, doesn't feel the needs to talk to someone, and for awhile she seemed like she was pulling it off. Part of her secret is to take life a bit slower, and not get too many things going, but she is so in control of that now at 21.

It is a difficult thing, and my heart breaks for those that have these problems. I think it is something that you struggle with for most of your life. I will keep you in my prayers.
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