How do you transition from "lacy lingerie" to "flannel pjs"?? Figuratively, that is..
Yah, so this is only my second serious relationship because the first one went on for 3 years... so even though I feel very experienced at being in a relationship I am finding it wierd going through the whole getting to know you thing again. We have been together for 4 and a half months at this point and are kind of reaching the point where you go from having every moment being electrifyingly exciting to where things are getting comfy... but at the same time I think we are both a little bit uncomfortable because I think we are both afraid of the intense excitement going away and maybe not finding much underneath... I know that only time can tell with that one, and we both feel really good about the relationship in general, but I think we are a little bit afraid... I dunno.... I am kind of just having a bad weekend too because I miss him so much because school doesn't leave much time for each other... sigh.... what are other people's experiences with this transition?
that is why i say the lifespan of relationship should only last six months. i'm just kidding. of course i would love to be in a comfortable relationship where i feel like i no longer have to wear the sexy underwear and put on the cotton bikinis. the transition from the honeymoon stage is hard. the intense passion of the relationship will go away but what replaces it is a whole different feeling. it is a comfort. it is knowing that you have someone to turn to. it is the warmth that permeates your body. it is the smile that comes from out of the blue. it is all those things. to get to that point is not easy. it is a nice achievement.
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"Anyone who lives within their means suffers from a lack of imagination."
Some women dont understand that the cotton undies can be just as sexy as lacy ones. Different styles (boyleg, g-string, bikini) are all exciting and leaves a sense of wonderment... "What is under them" kind of thing.
I have been in a few long term relationships, and never got out of the excitement phase. There is always something new to do or try with your SO.
Hell if he stops liking you because of the clothes you wear (or dont wear) he isn't the one for you.
HAHA mini, I am not actually talking about clothes... it is a metaphor about going from the "honeymoon phase" when you are always kind of "on" for each other to the comfy phase where you let your guard down... like the difference between sexy lingerie and flanned pjs...
Like in the movie High Fidelity when the main character was talking to his girlfriend and he says "I used to have fantasies about being surrounded by women's lingerie for the rest of my life... but then I realized they only bring out the good stuff when they know they are going to sleep with you" and his girlfriend says..."I have lingerie..." and he says "You have great lingerie, but you also have those cotton panties that have been washed a hundred times... I am tired of the fantasy..." that is a paraphrase... but the undies thing is just a metaphor about geting comfortable with someone...
I don't mean that it isn't still exciting, we make eachother laugh all the time and are humping like bunnies 24/7... did it 3 times yesterday... we are always excited to talk to each other when the other calls and send sweet e-mails... I think it is more that we are realizing that this could be a long term thing, that is is getting serious, and it is kind of scary building up the trust and everything else that you need to "go to the next level" of really being comfortable as partners rather than people who are just dating and trying to see what will happen....
Lacy lingerine is when your'e on the phone, he starts slowly undressing you, and you haistly finish the phone call and get in to some hot sex.
Emptiness is when you cover the mouthpiece of the phone, briefly scream abuse at him for touching you, when you don't want it, and go back to the phone.
Comfort is when you continue with your conversation on the phone right through the sex, and only cover the mouthpiece during orgasm. Mostly because you still enjoy the sex but you arent about to lose out on the latest gossip.
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