[mlchris2]

I meet with my attorney and asked him all sorts of questions. If my wife and I end up in a divorce situation, I want to be ready. I'd go back to him with this question, but I'd have to pay him for it... so I thought I would ask first

I asked about child support and figured out on my states rules how much I would pay. Given my current situation and financial responsibilities, I am going to have to work a second job to afford my living and support. Another downfall is I watch my kids at nights.

I want to know... being that I cant watch the kids to fulfil my obligation for child support, I must work, therefore my wife must take the kids to a day care or pay for a babysitter. Is childcare part of child support or are they two seperate things?

I fear the worst and looks like Im going to have to pay over $1400 a month to my wife and childcare...

[slubberdegullion]

It really depends on your jurisdiction. Some places tie the two together, others don't. You may be able to do an online search to find a definitive answer.

[Hot Coco]

I have a lawyer in the family who specializes in this area. It depends on your state. In my state, it's separate I believe (I didn't ask my family member though) But I'm pretty sure in my state the child support given to spouse is separate. It's based on your income.

I don't get the part about watching kids at night???? What does that mean. Have you asked about joint custody? That's the best way all the way aroun d. More time with kids and less child support. You keep them one week and wife the next.

[Mz. Pixie]

If you split custody it may be that you could get a decreased amount for "Time spent with child".

My husband pays a flat amount of child support which was reduced because he had joint custody. Out of that amount she pays daycare.

My exhusband pays the daycare for our two and that's all he pays per our agreement.

Just depends on the state but your attorney should negotiate for you.

She's been unfaithful so use that to your advantage. She may not want to wait and drag the divorce out in court. Tell her you won't push on the adultery if she'll settle for less $.

[mlchris2]

I think in my state child care expenses are seperate, actually....

while were seperated the deal is... I pay all the bills and I dont pay her anything. If she needs $$$ for some food or something for the kids, I'll give it to her. I work during the day (7a-4p) and she watches them during the day....she works at night (between 4p-12a and weekends its 4p-1a), so inturn I watch the kids at her place... cause I'm living with her parents right now.

If we divorce, I'd have to pay $700 month to my wife for child support. That is with her having Primary custody. Now with joint custody, I would have to pay $400. Pne thing that does affect this is she is a waitress and is barely making $1000 a month working 40+ hours a week. In my state, when calculating child support they take 40 hrs and multiply it by minimum wage. So they base it on the fact if my wife had to work, she would at least get minimum wage * 40 hours, regardless is she works 20 hours a week at $20 hr, the state takes which ever amount is greater. My income and current financial obligations will not alllow me to afford a place of my own, meet all my obligations and pay child support, when we were together we were barely making ends meet. I am however working on getting rid of a few bills, downsizing vehicle for lower payment/better mileage. Even if I get rid of items, I'd still have to work a second job, which would prohibit me from having the kids at nights, therefore the needs for childcare has surfaced.... so since I have the kids at nights, does that mean I am responsible for child care expenses? If we cant decide on a compromise, would the court say who pays what?

I got more juice for you... I'll update another post. more so you know whats going on, if you care...

thanks

[Mz. Pixie]

Chris, I wish I knew more to tell you. It's damn hard. You're right that most people have to pick up a second job to continue to be able to LIVE.

I couldn't work a second job because I had no one to help me with my kids. No family and all of my friends turned their backs on me. My husband now though worked a second job and still does to be able to provide for his son and now his new family. So, I feel ya.

I'm still interested........