[Liliana]

OK, well there's a guy I like a lot at university. We are friend-ly, but not really within the same circles of friends, if that makes sense. He is an interesting and kind person, and (I think) good looking too. I've known him on this kind of basis for two years (though I was away most of the last one), but still it hasn;t really got past seeing each other around the library or the bar or wherever and stopping for a chat. If I know he's around I'll seek him out so we can talk, and he always seems interested and genuinely pleased to see me, however, I can't decide whether this is just because he is the kind of person who always enjoys a good conversation or if he might possibly feel something for me too. We can talk for ages and I just have the feeling that of we saw each other more socially, we could really have something great going.

Anyway, the question is: How can I make these opportunities to see him and get to know him better without it being too much, too soon and scaring him away? Would it be crazy just to find an opportune moment and confess how I feel? We both finish uni this June and I feel a little under pressure to do something, before I miss the opportunity; I know I'd hate never knowing what might have been. But for the time being, what do I do?

[slubberdegullion]

The university library is a great place to strike up a conversation. Look at the books he picks up, then start a conversation. From there, you could say something like, "I'm heading over to such-and-such for a coffee and a bagel, and I'd love to hear more about the subject/book. Care to join me?" It's non-threatening, and gives you both something to discuss.

DON'T DON'T DON'T leap in to telling him all about your feelings, at least not yet. That's sure to give him the heebie-jeebies (technical term for what happens when a guy is confronted by that icky "feelings" stuff too soon in a relatinship).

Good luck, and keep us posted!

[Liliana]

Will give it a try. Thanks!

[Milo]

OK, so how did the coffe invite go?

[Liliana]

I haven't seen him the last couple of days, so zero opportunities (fortunately this is a healthy reflection of the fact that neither of us spends all our time in the library...)! I guess it's gonna have to wait until I see him again. I did think of a good place to go for coffee though... lol.