Do women find extraverts or introverts attractive?

mrB2006 · 14th October 2005, 12:51 PM

I admit it. I am an introvert. I am not necessarily proud of that. Being an introvert has caused me many problems in the love department.

I sometimes show my extraverted side when I am around someone I care for. But in general I put up my defenses.

What do women like more: An extravert or an introvert?

Is the night out on the town more romantic than looking at 19th century art?
Is dancing more fun than watching a classic black and white movie?

My interests primarily are introverted in nature: classic foreign films, classical music, new age music, philosphy, and art. However, I also enjoy sports, classic rock, and action movies. (I am obsessed with pink floyd and coldplay-I am a baseball fanatic).

But whenever I meet a woman I am interested in, it seems as though the introverted side of me always gets in the way. (The shy nebbish type takes over for some reason).

I guess I am a late-bloomer to the whole dating thing.

mrB2006

newbby · 14th October 2005, 1:00 PM

i really dont think it matters either way, but, what women love is mystery. as long as you dont tell her what youre feeling or worse ask her how she is feeling. extroverts who are slightly cocky do it, and so do shy guys who you have to try and work out..

megabit15 · 14th October 2005, 1:31 PM

I personally like the introspective types more, but it's usually the extroverts who introduce you to new people. I think that extroverts meet more people due to their very natures, but introverts get to know them a little deeper.

However, too much introversion can be stifling if not balanced with variety. New experiences and variety inject fresh air into a relationship. But if only one person does all the fresh air work, it becomes somewhat lop-sided and tiresome. Nothing wrong with 19th Century Art AND dancing.

You sound like you have a good balance of things - a genuine quality guy. Most decent women (the ones worth having) are patient while a shy guy opens up. It is something truly worth waiting for!

JS17 · 14th October 2005, 1:39 PM

I think this question, like a lot of the either or questions, are kind of silly because everyone is going to have a different answer.

I think that there has to be some kind of balance. I think that you will find women who are attracted to introverted men such as yourself and women who will only want an extroverted man.

It's all in the choosin'

noclobber · 14th October 2005, 3:48 PM

I can guarantee that Extroverts are the ones that go everywhere in life!

It's not just in the dating field but also in career, social life, etc. extroverts tend to fair better than their introvert counterparts. People like people that are more outgoing and open up. That makes them comfortable and easy to talk to. And once you begin to talk you are showing what type of person you are and if the person listening to you likes what he/she hears then obviously they would love to spend more time with you or get to know you better. So one good thing leads to another...

I have experienced this myself.. I am from India and I can vouch that I am an introvert by nature. During school days we were punished for talking too much and we literally grew up socially awkward. After all if u are not even good at talking then obviously u will do poor socially. That caught up after I came to the USA and began its impact on me. I realized that more than intelligence, ability, skills, etc... its your social connections that take you places. I watched my less talented but extrovert friends march ahead of me with the best jobs. And how did they get those jobs? Since they are extroverts they go out, meet people and open up. That creates connections and connections take you places! The dating game is no different!!! Even if women tell u otherwise! They will say that they like nice, calm, intelligent guys but if u watch they will actually be going out with the exact opposite. Come one Ladies, tear me up

I am much better now but i am still working on it.. trying to be more outgoing and social. And my advice to you wud be the same. Good Luck!!!

kitkat826 · 14th October 2005, 6:07 PM

I am an extroverted person who loves to go dancing, travel, be the life of the party. My job requires me to negotiate and schmooze a lot. However, I used to be very shy as a child and understand where "quieter folks" are coming from. I tend to be attracted to guys who are more on the introverted side, but open with me. Although I am rather outgoing, I am very conservative emotionally in relationships. I like someone who socially I can bring out of their shell, and who emotionally can bring me out my mine.

SuperMonk · 14th October 2005, 6:09 PM

I think I'd do better with a more outgoing girl than an introverted girl. Especially someone that likes talking about weird shat too.

15th October 2005, 3:47 AM

i like shy boys that are loud with their friends. i like them quiet and shy to me and later loosen up and goofy with their friends. that means they are genuine and sorta nervous and thats exciting! if they are too confident they aren't totally into you. i want him to be a little ancy and fidgety. its sweet to think that i make him a little different. he'll come around, no problem.