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Am I paranoid?


Archive A collection of the original messages posted on LoveShack.org's LoveTalk Forum from 1997-2001.

Old 27th July 1999, 8:32 PM   #1
josie
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Am I paranoid?

My boyfriend and I live together and work different hours. He goes on my computer when I'm at work or in the middle of the night when I'm sleeping. I know that most of what he does on the internet involves porn. The .gif images stay on the computer's hard drive. It bugged me when I first found out, but I think I can handle that.

The problem is that he used to leave these little post-it notes lying around the computer with girls' names and e-mail addresses on them in his handwriting. At first, I questioned him about this. He apologized and said, it was nothingbut that he would stop doing it. He only stopped leaving the notes by the computer. Now I find them on the floor under the bed, or in his pockets when I'm doing laundry. He also has many different e-mail addresses that he thinks I don't know about. I don't know if I should be worried or if this is just something I should ignore. I find it very difficult to stop thinking about it. I should mention that in every other aspect of our relationship, there are no real problems. I do trust him, but I'm afraid I may be starting to doubt that trust. Am I paranoid?
 
Old 27th July 1999, 9:13 PM   #2
Joe
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Re: Am I paranoid?

I think what you should do is pull him aside, and honestly tell him how you feel about what he's doing and how he is hurting you by doing what he's doing. I just broke up recently with girlfriend (she met a guy on IRC and left me for him, she has two teenage kids and he has one 13YO son)...and it sounds like what I did towards the end of my relationship with my ex.

What you need to do is communicate. Tell him how you feel. If he loves you, he'll respect you and stop...right there and never ever do it again. If he doesn't...well...you guys will have to talk about that.

I hope that helps. I know advice coming from one that just broke up with someone he loves....is tough.

Joe
 
Old 28th July 1999, 4:25 PM   #3
Kaz
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Re: Am I paranoid?

The porn thing is normal alot of guys use porn/masturbation to relieve stress, and he's doing it when you aren't available. I think you have a right to worry about the women's email address, I suppose its possible that these are just friends but I would at least ask him about. No you are not paranoid.
Quote:
I think what you should do is pull him aside, and honestly tell him how you feel about what he's doing and how he is hurting you by doing what he's doing. I just broke up recently with girlfriend (she met a guy on IRC and left me for him, she has two teenage kids and he has one 13YO son)...and it sounds like what I did towards the end of my relationship with my ex. What you need to do is communicate. Tell him how you feel. If he loves you, he'll respect you and stop...right there and never ever do it again. If he doesn't...well...you guys will have to talk about that. I hope that helps. I know advice coming from one that just broke up with someone he loves....is tough. Joe
 
 

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