[MyManCantletgo]

Well Last week I told the Love Shack that I was attracted to this new guy at work that I was not to sure I was ready to cheat on my boyfriend with. I have been with my boyfriend for three years and had never cheated on him but he has cheated on me. Well the worst is over I have finally cheated and to be completely honest I don't feel any better then before it happended. I don't feel guilty at all. And to tell you the truth I actully think it has allowed me to be comfortable around him and it actually has spiced up our sex life of cause I am so much better at cheating then he is that he would never suspect anything so I continue the affier that I have started. To tell you the absolut truth my boyfriend is a way better lover but the trill of the naughtyness of the sex is what keeps me comeing back it is a major turn on to have forbiddin sex with this co-worker. the only down fall I seem to be having is that I catch myself daydreaming about him and find myself having butterflies in my stomech about coming to work and doing the naught trust me I am not in love with this guy I know how to controlle my emotions very well but I just haven't had another lover in so long I am begining to feel like a school girl agian and I know with those actions I am bound to get caught what do you think I should do to spice up the relationship I already have instead of killing it with the one I have just started?????


Thank you
MyMAnCantLetGo

[MsMree]

I'm not so sure this relationship is even worth it...

[MsMree]

hit the wrong button.

My point is that i don't think a relationship should need spicing-up after only 3 yrs. - that is not a long time. If you are cheating on your BF after only 3 yrs. to spice up your sex life, what do you think you'll have to do in say 6 yrs?

[LucreziaBorgia]

Originally Posted by MyManCantletgo

what do you think I should do to spice up the relationship I already have instead of killing it with the one I have just started?????

A better question would be - why are you holding on to a security-blanket relationship that only got better by having sex with someone else behind your b/f's back? You do realize in order to keep this 'high' you have - you'll end up repeating your pattern of cheating since you aren't finding that 'high' within your existing relationship (and the sad truth of it is that once that 'spice' is gone its rare if not impossible to retrieve it). If that works for you, then G_d help your boyfriend - but have you considered just trying to find a relationship that doesn't need that sort of 'spicing up'?

As for spicing up what you have - that starts with your emotional state. You have to really want and desire your boyfriend on many levels in order for that to happen. Just 'spicing things up' won't make that desire come back. It already has to be in place. Do you have that desire inside you?

[whichwayisup]

Be alone for a while and figure out who and what you want. Being alone might be good for you.

Whether he cheated on you in the past or not, right now, you intentionally, willingly cheated on your boyfriend, no guilt. That is wrong. Two wrongs do not make a right.

You've basically channelled the energy from the OM into your boyfriend. That won't last long. Your bf probably will find out you're cheating, especially if he's cheated on you, he'll know the signs...Or if he becomes suspicious, he'll go digging to see what's happening. Either way, alot of hurt feelings and pain will happen if you don't decide who you want. Break up with the b/f or fix the relationship by going to couples therapy.