Reading some of the posts on younger women (minors in most cases) in love with much older men makes me wonder just what age difference is appropriate for a relationship.

Obviously in the case of these teen-agers the age difference factor is more serious, but what about a woman in her mid-twenties going out with a man in his fourties for example? I don't see the age difference factor being as relavant when the two parties are both mature adults.

(When I was involved with Pavel I was 25 and he was 42 and in many instances I acted more "adult" than he. An earlier boyfriend of mine was ten years older than me, but he acted even older than Pavel.I have NEVER been in a relationship with a man my own age.)

I personally think it works much if the woman is younger than the man. I have more of a problem with younger men going out with older women. Do you agree with me? What are your opinions on this issue?

Reading some of the posts on younger women

(minors in most cases) in love with much older
men makes me wonder just what age difference is
appropriate for a relationship.

It's a great question, and one I've been asking myself


after reading a lot of the messages here lately. My personal


situation is, of course, related: I'm a 28-year-old man


dating an 18-year-old woman. There are special challenges


to dating someone older or younger, of course, but my


personal feeling is that as long as both are mature, both


share the same (or similar) values systems (I'm sure most


people will agree that our values systems change drastically


as we get older), and both are comfortable with the


relationship, age differences aren't a huge issue. This,


of course, assumes that both people are above the age of


consent!



For what it's worth, Here's a few of the challenges (none


very major) that my own relationship has presented. I'd


love to hear about some obstacles that others have


encountered, too!

• She doesn't understand what it means to end a long-term
  
  
  relationship. When we started dating, I was in the process
  
  
  of ending a 10-year relationship with my then-wife (we had
  
  
  been married for 5 of those years). Ending that relationship
  
  
  was the right thing to do, but my girlfriend didn't
  
  
  understand my feelings at all and wasn't very supportive.
  
  
• She doesn't have a very good grasp of the value of
  
  
  money, savings, etc. Did any of us before we had to be
  
  
  self-sufficient?
  
  
• I'm pretty out-of-touch with the styles of dress,
  
  
  speech, music, and dance that are popular with younger
  
  
  people today.
  
  
• Her parents were initially wary of our age difference,
  
  
  but they've warmed up to me.
  
  

I personally think it works much if the woman
is younger than the man

Why is that? I agree that when there's an age difference


it's usually a younger woman/older man relationship, but


why should this be any more stable than the other way


around? Are women more emotionally mature than men?

I don't se anything wrong with dating older men. My parents are 20 years apart. They're older now, and they were both married once before, but they are happy, and I am happy with my b/f who is 4 years older. Go ahead.

have fun,

Chal