[heartnsoul]

I'm just wondering how one finds closure when someone just walks out of your life?? My ex asked me for a 'break' a little over a month ago and called a couple times after that to tell me that he was sturggling with things but never officially ended it with me. I haven't talked to him in a month now and I have my good days and my bad days.

We were together for four intense months and spent our weekends together either at his place or mine and things just seemed comfortable between us.

I know that time heals all and this isn't my first 'heartbreak' but my first split w/out anykind of goodbye and I'm finding it really hard to just let go. I'm somewhere between anger and denial at this point.

I knew that it had been awhile since he'd been in a relationship because his ex had cheated on him and I know he was really taken aback by that whole situation. Although they had been broken up for 2 yrs they had a daughter together and that made it even more difficult because he still has to deal with her. I guess that fact doesn't matter at this point.

I knew that he had issues but I just never thought that he would be capable of doing this.

Has anyone experienced anything similar to this and what was the outcome?

[Art_Critic]

Been there done that .. in fact the last realtionship was like that.

You need to be able to create your own closure.. closure comes from within you not from someone else.

I know it sucks that they dog you like that but try not to dwell on trying to find out why ?? Or the what ifs ??

You will tear yourself down if your don't just buck up and try and move on ..

Work on yourself .. and try and find someone new ..

[unsafe]

Maybe he didn't know what to say. maybe he felt that 4 months just wasn't enough time to make is a serious thing like you did. Who knows the fact is he is gone not calling not seeing you. You need to be strong and pick up the pieces value yourself. Know how important and special you are. That if a guy can just walk out on you like that is not you its him. He has some unresolved issues he needs to take care of and it just doesn't concern you no matter how much you would like to be there for him. This is his thing and if he wanted you there believe me you would be.

I was with a guy for 4 months and he is very flaky and wishy washy I decided that I wasn't going to call and end it. Since we were only dating not spending every waking moment together I believe its ok. He was a jerk to me treated me like crap so its cool I am making my own closure they guy wasn't that into it and I am over it. now he could be totally into me and just be retarded and slow and shy but since he can't speak up and treat me with respect I know I deserve because i was very good to this man the 4 months we dated. That I know I can gather it all and say I did my best and its not worth fighting over. I am sure in a few more days of me not calling he will get the hint. Maybe he will call maybe he wont. Either way it doesn't matter every person deserves respect and he didn't show me that. I never said I was going to call him. I am not breaking any promises.

I think you need to look at yourself and realize how much you are and what you are. What do you deserve. Do you deserve a guy who can just walk out on you like yeah excuses excuses he has issues dont' we all! come on now. I am sure you have issues but you are still in there and willing to be there for him. if he can't do the same its time to move on.

[heartnsoul]

unsafe.....I see the truth in your words but in all honesty, he was as serious as I was. At one point he had said that he wanted to move in together. I was the one who suggested we waited until we got some more time under our belt. I met his family pretty quick including his daughter. I just think we may've gone too fast. You're right though .. If he wanted me there, I would still be with him.

I think had we had a big blow out, this would've been a little easier but we never really argued about anything.

My only option at this point is to 'buck up' and move on. I definitely deserve better.

Thank both of you for your replies