Another thing that I have been thinking about lately is our living situation. I posted a while back about how I'm going to have to move out of the house I live in now because my family is selling it. Fine. I don't want to buy it so I was planning on moving into an apartment. Well, recently my bf talked to his ex and she is planning on moving out of the house that they bought together. She told him that he could have the house when she moved. So, my bf wants me and my son to move into his house with him. It's a nice house, a lot better than the one I'm in now. His ex is also okay with him and I being together with the condition that as long as I was good to her kids. I love her kids so no problems there. So, what do you think about this? I would be moving into the house they bought and lived in as a married couple. I'm not too bothered by it, but do you think that this is a bad idea? Has any one else ever been in this situation and did it cause problems of any sort?
Houses don't have memories. You may make some in there but once people are out and gone, they take those memories with them. I don't think its a bad idea. Now you get to pee all over the house and mark your territory. Go for it! What do you have to lose?
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I would sell it and make a profit and put a down payment on another house that you both picked out together. And if that's out of the question, just paint and put your touch to the house.
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Originally posted by Opium
I would sell it and make a profit and put a down payment on another house that you both picked out together. And if that's out of the question, just paint and put your touch to the house.
Well, he thought of selling it, but the house is nice and needs very little work. It is also a good size 3 br 2 bath and the payment is only around $500 a month. I live in a small town and it's hard to find a good house in that price range. It would be better for us financially to move into this house. I just don't want it to be wierd or anything. I know that neighbors are going to be confused for a while seeing him with me instead of his wife.
Originally posted by gtab
Well, he thought of selling it, but the house is nice and needs very little work. It is also a good size 3 br 2 bath and the payment is only around $500 a month. I live in a small town and it's hard to find a good house in that price range. It would be better for us financially to move into this house. I just don't want it to be wierd or anything. I know that neighbors are going to be confused for a while seeing him with me instead of his wife.
That sounds nice! Don't worry what the neighbors think, introduce yourself and your family and that's it. What matters is that your family is together and healthy. Just put your touch and it will eventually feel like home.
Thanks, I think that's exactly what I'll do. I just hope he is open to me changing things and making it our home. I'm sure he will be. He seems really excited about the idea of me living their with him. I think for the most part it's because he will be giving me a better living situation then what I am accustomed to. He wants me to be happy and if he thinks I will be happy their then I'm sure that I will be. I trust his judgment completely.
Hang your family pictures, your decorating ideas, your furniture. It's just a house, and if it bugs you that it was their 'home', make it your home and fill it with your presence.
Originally posted by gtab
Another thing that I have been thinking about lately is our living situation. I posted a while back about how I'm going to have to move out of the house I live in now because my family is selling it. Fine. I don't want to buy it so I was planning on moving into an apartment. Well, recently my bf talked to his ex and she is planning on moving out of the house that they bought together. She told him that he could have the house when she moved. So, my bf wants me and my son to move into his house with him. It's a nice house, a lot better than the one I'm in now. His ex is also okay with him and I being together with the condition that as long as I was good to her kids. I love her kids so no problems there. So, what do you think about this? I would be moving into the house they bought and lived in as a married couple. I'm not too bothered by it, but do you think that this is a bad idea? Has any one else ever been in this situation and did it cause problems of any sort?
I think everyone is telling you what they think from * their own perspective * (which is good) but from what YOU are telling me, since you don't have an issue than it seems you've already answered your own question. My only question is if this is a convience thing or is there going to be marriage in the future? In other wordsis he going to charge you rent (financial situation) or is the free sex (going to be married one day) good enough? ;-)
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- Mitch
"I am my own best friend... "
Last edited by NYCmitch25; 16th August 2005 at 12:19 PM..
I am not sure if either of us are ready for marriage. Especially since he just got out of one. I would consider myself his equal. He wont charge me rent, but I will pay bills as well as him. It's just like the situation now. He lives with me and pays some of the bills at my house. I dont' expect to leach off of him.
Originally posted by gtab
She told him that he could have the house when she moved.
There is one other thing that must be adressed. It is a house they own together, now she says he can "have" it. There are many legal and tax implications with this that need to be explored. As long as she is on title and/or the mortgage she has certain rights and obligations, as does he.
I am in Real Estate and I see the charred wreckage of many such informal arangements. Of course many work out well and those are the ones we never hear about. But I can say from experience that many don't and when they don't it usually isn't pretty. The best thing for everyone involved is do it properly in the beginning.
A few bucks for an attorney's and tax accountant's advice would be money well spent.
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