I have liked this girl for four (4) years and ever since I started I wanted to stop. I never informed her of my feelings, and the reason I do not wish to express them are not important: the thing is that I have been trying for so long to quit this and have found no luck.

This is more than I have liked any other girl, and I am having a difficult time dealing with it: it is getting worse the more I try to resist. If anyone can please help me quit, that would be most appreciated. I am feeling quite desperate and any help would be great.

[Sounobvious]

How about dating others to help you forget about them... who knows maybe you'll meet someone who intrests you even more than that person.. of course this wont work if u dont want a relationship...

Yeah, I don't want a relationship.

[NYCmitch25]

Originally posted by ExothermicMan
I have liked this girl for four (4) years and ever since I started I wanted to stop. I never informed her of my feelings, and the reason I do not wish to express them are not important: the thing is that I have been trying for so long to quit this and have found no luck.

This is more than I have liked any other girl, and I am having a difficult time dealing with it: it is getting worse the more I try to resist. If anyone can please help me quit, that would be most appreciated. I am feeling quite desperate and any help would be great.

A very good question for which I've had similar experiences. Perhaps, in you being moonstruck for her it has fostered an idealization of what a relationship would be like with her? Basically where she is perfect in your eyes desipite her obvious flaws. Also she may be the "unobtainable type" which doesn't help either and if I were you, I would wonder if she is desired *more* because of these types of reasons? I guess I'm suggesting you find the root of your strong abnormal feelings (I'm only saying abnormal because by now the "crush" should have subsided). Anyway, I would look up methods online for how to get over a major relationship and follow them.

Good luck buddy, (you are going ot need it) LOL

[NYCmitch25]

Originally posted by Sounobvious
How about dating others to help you forget about them... who knows maybe you'll meet someone who intrests you even more than that person.. of course this wont work if u dont want a relationship...

That may work because it can help people naturally go though the phases of getting over someone but conversly it may create bigger problems.... In a sense you are "using" someone else which could unfortunely play out taking the strongest meaning of that word. We've all seen that a few too many times. Anyway, this is a tough question to answer and if I did have an answer, I would bottle it and sell it on ebay. ;-)

[AndrewJ]

Try doing new things and meeting new peolple.

You need to change the rut your in.

U need to move in a different direction, trust me the didvidends will be trumps

[laRubiaBonita]

try and find out some not so nice things about her that will help to turn you off.

Or just remind yourself, that her Poop smells like *****! Ewwww!!!!!!!!

Thanks for all the suggestions! However she is not the unobtainable type (in fact I have heard from several comrades of mine that she does like me) and I do not consider her perfect: she is not the best looking but she is OK, and I do believe myself to be more intelligent and of roughly similar attractiveness.

I have no intention to enter a relationship with her or anyone else, and I have spent a great deal of time doing many other things. I cannot shake this one off.

The problem is despite all of these facts I still cannot get rid of a longing for her regardless of how hard I try. I guess this is really messed up, and I really want this to end.

[elijahBailey]

do you think the reason why you can't shake her off your mind is cos you need to see her everyday, like in a work situation? Cos if it's not, then simply implementing a no-contact would normally do the trick...

No, the thing is that I liked her when I did see her everyday, and that was about 2 years ago. When I stopped seeing her, my feelings have not changed. I don't think I am making up some sort of glorified image, because my feelings were the same regardless of whether I saw her or not.

I just can't get this out of my head. I think there may be something wrong with me, but I don't know hot to fix it. I also don't know how effective thinking about poop when thinking of her will be. Maybe it will just die with time.

[NYCmitch25]

Originally posted by ExothermicMan
No, the thing is that I liked her when I did see her everyday, and that was about 2 years ago. When I stopped seeing her, my feelings have not changed. I don't think I am making up some sort of glorified image, because my feelings were the same regardless of whether I saw her or not.

I just can't get this out of my head. I think there may be something wrong with me, but I don't know hot to fix it. I also don't know how effective thinking about poop when thinking of her will be. Maybe it will just die with time.

OK, so when you saw her everyday how was that interaction? did you covet her from afar or did you guys hang out often and possibly have a meaningful friendship? What does she think of you? Does she have a boyfriend? You are stating that you might have a problem, I don't know you so it's hard to say if it's a common case of "it's the one that got away" to something abnormal like "covering bedroom wall with pictures of her". I guess only you can decide. It can be quite normal to have feelings like this and I can cite examples from my own life ... Maybe giving it time is the only answer, now if your feelings are blocking you from having a normal life or dating other people, I suggest you seek counciling.

Well, I don't have pictures of her in my room or anything like that. I just can't get her out of my head: despite my trying I can't change that. I don't know if she has a boyfriend; I dont really care. What she does is her business, I just don't want my thoughts to be directed toward her. Sometimes we did hang out, in a group, I generally stayed quite far away from her and other females and just chilled with my friends.

The only reason I said I liked her in my first post is because I could not stop thinking about her: the problem with that is I don't enjoy thinking about her, and I want it to stop ASAP.

The thing is that I don't want a relationship with anyone. It just hurts so much to not be able to get this out of my head. All I want is to get her out and make room for other things (such as golf or stock market). This is taking up valuable resources that can otherwise be directed toward something useful.

This is not the one that "got away" because my comrades earlier told me that she indeed does like me (without any indication given by me to provoke this, I am exptremely careful about matters such as these) and it is by choice that I do not want her. Yet she keeps cropping up in my head and I cannot get her out. Is there anything I can do to get her out: maybe hypnosis or something. I really think this is a problem because I DONT WANT HER TO BE IN MY HEAD! Sort of like people dont want cancer in their bodies. If anyone can help me cure this mental cancer I would be most appreciative.

[Jayhawks]

Why fight it?
Just accept that you feel for this girl and learn to live with it.

Does the fact that she likes you also make things harder for you?
Spending time trying to irradiate something unwanted only makes you want it more. Stop fighting it and maybe it will lose its appeal in time.