[Denise496078]

Hi there my name is Denise and im 18yrs old. Im 5 months pregnant and expecting a little boy! I've been with my boyfriend now for almost 3 years. I met him when i was 15 and he was 16. He wasnt addicted to anything when we met but about 2 months later after we started dating he starting takin pills. His pill of choice for the past 2yrs and a half has been percacets. He's almost 19 now and he is trying to detox. He tried detoxin before about 2 or 3 times but everytime he did he was doin it to make everyone else happy and not for himself. This time he came out and told me and his parents that he is still addicted...he wants help...and wants to detox and stop for good. Im very glad that he came out and told us but it has been very hard for me. It was harder to understand wat it was like to deal with a drug addicted before but with time i've tried a lot and i've been very understanding. I love my boyfriend to death and we cant wait till we have our baby and have our family.

Hes been detoxin now for about 2 weeks but i found out that just a couple days agod he messed up and ended up going to a friends 19th birthday party got drunk and did some blow. He doesnt know that i know and im not very sure if im going to yell at him for it or if im going to try to talk to him about it. Its been very hard trying to help him and just dealin with the addict behavior. I really need some advice on wat i should do and how i can help him more. I have never been addicted to anything in my life so i dont kno wat that would be like. I just try very hard to be understandin and be there for him and be helpful. Hes experimented with a lot of different drugs but hes just been addicted to pills. He really wants to get off them and start a new life sober and clean. I kno he is trying very hard but it makes me so mad that he cant say NO when he gets himself in these situations when he knows there is drugs around.

Someone please respond and give sum advice. Its been very hard the past almost 3 yrs and i've been trying my hardest to help him but at times i get so sick of it all that i just want to give up and i feel that now i should be more concern about my health and about my baby. I need some advice on wat i should do or how i should be more helpful to understand wat is like to be addicted to something. Please help...


Denise

[Zaira]

If he really wants to do it, then he won't put himself in situations where he's tempted to take them. A baby is a big responsibility, and he needs to get out of this "party" lifestyle.

He should speak to a doctor, and maybe get a referral to a rehab clinic. Or possibly counselling - which they do at the rehab centres anyway.

All the best

[Denise496078]

Hi there Zaira.

Thanxs for the advice. I know he really wants to do this hes been doin sooo good for the last almost 3 weeks now. Hes been at home the whole time just detoxin. I cant understand y he gets himself in this situation when he knows thats hes just going to end up gettin drunk and doin something stupid. I really really dont understand that part at all!! He did go to rehab for about 3 days but it honestly didnt work out for him. All the ppl there where heroin addicts and all they did was talk about how u shoot up heroin and they were all exchangin numbers so they could do it together. I live in Cleveland, Ohio and honestly Cleveland has no rehab centers that help. I agree about councelin and hes talked to me how he wants to do it and wants to go into meetins also but i guess hes not going to start that until hes not sick anymore and is done with the hard part of detoxin. I have a question for you tho....So on thursday i found out that he ended up going to his friends 19th birthday party at night after he dropped me off at home. He said he was going straight home because he was really tired. The next day i talked to him and i asked So was your friend mad that u didnt end up going over and hes like naw he wasnt mad. I just found out yesterday that he ended up going...got drunk and did blow. I dont really know if i should just talk to him and ask so whens the last time u've gotten really f****ed up and see if he lies about it first. Or if i should just bring it up and ask him why did he end up partyin that night when he said he didnt. Ahhh im sooooo confused and i mean i cant just not say anything. I kno hes really sorry because i found an online forum he has too where he wrote how sry he was and how he screwed up big time and really regrets doin it....i dont really kno wat to do. What do u think? Thanxs so much for replyin back its a big help!!! Take Care

Denise

[shamen]

Hi Denise,

Maybe he should think about going to a NA meeting, Narcotics Anonymous. It's going to be a mix of all kinds of different people, not just heroin addicts.

Here's a link:

www.na.org/

Also, for you, a link to Nar-Anon, a group made for family or friends of people who have drug problems. It can help you figure out what you can do and how to deal with it.

http://nar-anon.org

I had a bf for 4 1/2 years that problems with drugs and alcohol. It's a long road. Admittedly, we are no longer together as he just couldn't get it together, but that doesn't mean that you two won't work out. It sounds like your bf is a little more motivated to get clean.

Good luck!