Hi y'all. I'm so lost I don't think I can stand myself. Maybe I'm in denial. I guess I have a problem with alcohol, I don't know.

I am a stay at home mom, and I count down the hours till they go to bed, so I can have some drinks, but only lately because hubby has been working so late, that I don't have time to get out for my hour of me time. I've always been on and off drinker like that. More like a binge drinker. Even when I limit myself to weekends only, I count down the days.

I have a lot of issues in my life, most of which are buried due to a stepfather telling me to quit crying for attention, and an alcoholic dad who was never there. I've since repaired my relationship with my dad, but my step dad nevers comes to see me, only my mom ALONE without him. (they live 6 hours away). It's like all of a sudden recently, since I've been married, my step dad decided that he doesn't have to try anymore to be a father to me.

Hubby is very supportive, just says he is afraid for me. I just don't want to feel pain anymore....

[shamen]

I feel your pain girl. I'm experiencing a lot of the same stuff that you are right now... Browse the Addictions forum and you can find the thread that I started on the same subject. Truthfully, I don't know how I missed your thread...

Anyway, I hope that you're talking to your hubby about what's going on. It's really important to talk to someone.

I've been thinking about AA, honestly. Kind of a scary thought, but I think that I might need to just find a way to deal with not drinking, ya know? Maybe you might want to think about it too? Are you seeing a counselor about what happened with your fathers?

[A Fly onThe Wall]

I've alway's said that " if you think you have a drinking problem you most likely do "

People without drinking problems do not ask theselves if they have a problem.

Contact you local AA chapter from the phone book.. They will have a 12th stepper call you and come out to see you and go to a meeting..
Or you can just find out where the meetings are and go..


You are already on the start of getting to step 1 "Admitting you are powerless over alcohol and that your life has become unmanagable"

Good luck..