[Bellona]

Well, I've been in a relationship for 8 months. He was out of town for 6 weeks for a graduate course, and we had decided to keep things open for when he returns. Okay, I figured I'd see what would happen.

We've still talked on the phone all the time, we write each other, make plans to see each other, and tell each other how much we miss each other. Someone asked him if we were bf/gf, and I responded too late and he said we were "in a bit of a holding pattern." I was floored, because we have way too much going on to be on hold, or so I thought.

I thought about that, and the next day I wrote a short e-mail with my feelings on it. I had been frustrated by an ex contacting me and other stresses, and I wrote him that I wondered if he was talking to me so much because he was lonely, and that I didn't want to feel like a hometown diversion on hold.

He totally blew up at me expressing this, and I apologized. He accepted it and still talks to me a lot--he initiates the contact always, but I feel that it's cold. He has started talking about seeing me when he returns again, but it still doesn't feel the same.

What can I do, other than give it time? I just want things to return to the way they were. I didn't think blowing up at me was warranted. I didn't want to be called a "hold." I was just upset at the connotations of that, and now I don't want him to drift away from me.

[Happy Noodle Boy]

Well, it seemed weird to me for your dude to blow up at you just for telling him how you felt. It shouldn't create too much drama and It'd be a shame for things to go sour over something like that. Give it some time but not too much. It should get back to normal.

[Bellona]

He comes home this weekend, and we'll see each other.

He said things should get back to normal.

Because our time here will be cut short by some unanticipated demands, he asked me to go along on his family's vacation.

I take that as a good sign--possible reparation. At least I'll have a better sense of direction during/after the trip, and will try to be the person he fell for in the first place. I have to stop thinking about the whole thing.