my BF needs to GROW UP!

steenerz · 15th July 2005, 1:57 PM

my bf is so lazy...mentally...we're home for the summer from college, and he won't find a job...sleeps into the afternoon...speaking of...

he was kicked out of his house 2 weeks ago, came back home two days ago. Last night we hung out, had an absolutely GREAT and romantic time...and he promised me that we'd hang out today before his dad got home from work since he had plans with him. I called him around 1, and he had woke up 5 minutes before. His dad will be home in an hour and a half. I asked him, "weren't we supposed to hang out today?" and he was like "yeah, i messed up big time." UGH! i'm so mad.

however, he thinks he might be somewhat depressed and maybe even slightly bipolar, which i think is where his "laziness" stems from...he doesn't have many friends either, just one that he hangs out with all the time.

just had to vent.

LucreziaBorgia · 15th July 2005, 2:16 PM

Quote:

he doesn't have many friends either, just one that he hangs out with all the time.

Hopefully its not that girl from an earlier post!

From reading your other posts, it doesn't sound like he's mentally ill. It sounds like he is just not as invested in your relationship on a consistent basis as you would like for him to be.

A Fly onThe Wall · 15th July 2005, 2:23 PM

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Originally posted by LucreziaBorgia
It sounds like he is just not as invested in your relationship on a consistent basis as you would like for him to be.

I agree or it could be that he is just tired and worn out from school and wants to sleep in everyday of his break.

It's been known to happen.. Sometimes as young kids we do stuff that makes no rational sense

steenerz · 15th July 2005, 2:27 PM

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Originally posted by A Fly onThe Wall
I agree or it could be that he is just tired and worn out from school and wants to sleep in everyday of his break.

It's been known to happen.. Sometimes as young kids we do stuff that makes no rational sense

Lucrezia...i don't think it's necessarily that he's not invested as much...he just doesn't thinnk we should be as serious as i'd like...we ARE 19, and sometimes i think, maybe i should stop actig like we're 25 and out of school or something...

but should i be mad at him??? ok dumb question...i'm trying to be understanding seeing that their family has been having problems so spending time with his dad is important...and i DID see hiim last night...it just hurts when someone says something and it doesn't happen.

LucreziaBorgia · 15th July 2005, 2:32 PM

I can understand being mad, and I think that's a valid emotion for you to have: along with frustration. But... here's what will do you no good: taking it out on him. I think you should be able to share your feelings with him, but don't make the mistake of making him the target of them.

Faith610 · 15th July 2005, 11:12 PM

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Originally posted by LucreziaBorgia
Hopefully its not that girl from an earlier post!

Nope not me!!! The guy I was referring to isn't in college any longer although the laziness is still plaguing him......Grow Up!!

LucreziaBorgia · 16th July 2005, 8:06 AM

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Originally posted by Faith610
Nope not me!!! The guy I was referring to isn't in college any longer although the laziness is still plaguing him......Grow Up!!

Quote:

Originally posted by LucreziaBorgia
Hopefully its not that girl from an earlier post!

I'm not sure what you mean. The girl I was referring to is a girl who tells Steenerz's boyfriend that she loves him, and who apparently he likes to hang out with. She had mentioned that in an earlier post of hers.

steenerz · 17th July 2005, 6:45 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by LucreziaBorgia
I'm not sure what you mean. The girl I was referring to is a girl who tells Steenerz's boyfriend that she loves him, and who apparently he likes to hang out with. She had mentioned that in an earlier post of hers.

LOL i'm confused too!

simplybrill · 20th July 2005, 3:16 PM

That IS kind of lazy. I would be mad that he just broke your plans because he wanted to sleep in, and not tell you. He should have just been like hey, im really tired, do you mind if we get together tomorrow?

If you guys just got out of classes, its understandable being burnt out from school but that doesnt explain why he's not working at all, and he sleeps into the afternoon. I dont think that's good and Im not much older than you guys are.

You're not wrong in thinking he should be doing something with his time. Being understanding of a bad family situation is important though, if he needs to spend more time with his dad right now, then that's what he needs to do.

You never know what's going on in people's houses sometimes, even if you ARE dating them, his parents might be about to split or something. Just know that you'll see him when you can, and not to make a hard time for him worse right now. You guys really care about each other, so youll see each other soon enough.