[gwennebe]

I recently met a guy and things are going so great between us!!! I've been happier than I've been in a long time and he's been a super great guy all around. He texts me at least twice a day during work just to say hello and that 's he's thinking about me. He's always taking me out to dinner and spoiling me. He always calls when he says he will and is willing to go out of his way to make me happy....We also waited about a month to have sex and now since we started having sex we see each other about 5 days a week and have sex constantly. We have that kind of chemistry and we feel really comfy around each other.

The problem is, I'm starting to freak myself out because I'm scared to death of getting hurt!!!! The thought of getting my heart broken terrifies me.. I'm starting to feel myself want to pull away. This sucks. I don't know what to do. Are we moving at too fast a pace?

[ConfusedInOC]

Read the link in my signature file.

[Kandy]

I know you would rather see a reply that contains helpful info, but I just wanted to let u know that you're not the only one. I'm in the same situation. I've been through so many bad relationships, and now that I have a great one with an awesome guy, I'm constantly afraid that I'm going to get hurt. You're not alone. I guess what we should do is just trust that they won't hurt us, and it will all work out
~Kandy

[gwennebe]

Condused: Thanks!! I guess that all makes sense!!!!

Kandy: Thank you. It's nice to know I'm not the only one feeling this way. I was wondering if this is normal or not. I just feel like he's too good to be true or soemthing.

[UltimateZen]

Just don't think about it...because thinking about getting your heart broken when things are going so well will self-destruct the delicate part of the relationship that the two of you are in. The two of you are in a great zone right now and my advise is to relish in it for all that it is worth. It is the experience that makes us who we are; without that we have no identity.

There is a line from one of my favorite movies, Vanilla Sky: " the sweet wouldn't be as sweet without the sour." We all have had sour relationships, but that only allows us to appreciate the sweetness of new found loves. So shine on you crazy diamond and enjoy your new found love. Don't try to sour out the sweetness so soon.

[Marshbear]

Sometimes you just have to go with your heart or you will never be happy. You might get hurt but if you don't take the chance you have never lived or loved. You will regret it if you pull away and don't see the potential of the relationship. Getting hurt is a painful experience and one that we try to avoid if we can but if we don't take the chance at some point then we will never realize the true potential within ourselves. Love is worth the risk.


peace...

[gwennebe]

Thank you for the great replies.

I'm going to try my best to not to worry about what could happen and just be myself. I guess that's all a person can do in any relationship and hope for the best.

[gwennebe]

How can I just let go when I have such a hard time trusting anyone???!!! I always feel like I'm going to be lied to or cheated on..

[ConfusedInOC]

Originally posted by gwennebe
How can I just let go when I have such a hard time trusting anyone???!!! I always feel like I'm going to be lied to or cheated on..

"A man who loves himself will have no rivals."

Seems to me you have a problem with confidence, self-esteem and self-assuredness. Why not pick up a book on those subjects and work on it?

The reality is you probably aren't going to be lied to all the time or cheated on. You need to live in the present which means stop worrying about what is going to happen and focus on what is happening now.

You are creating a self-fulfilling prophecy by being suspicious and lacking any confidence or self-esteem. It creates a vicious cycle that will end up exactly like you imagined.

If you have confidence in yourself you can face any issue that comes your way. And by being calm, confident, self-assured and with high self-esteem, you will attract people who admire those qualities (and most everyone does).

I can't say you'll never be lied to or cheated on. But understand those are things that are out of your control. Focus on the things in your life you CAN control and learn to let go of the things you can not.

My suggestion is to learn the serenity prayer and take it to heart.

Good luck.