Hey everyone, quick question. I know alot of times when approaching the 40 year old mark or even already in the 40's some people will go through a mid life crisis, some worse than others. Yes I think its different for different people. Have any of you gone though a mid life crisis? Was it bad? Not to bad? Did your spouse or s/o pick up on any clues that led them to believe you were going through one? How did it effet your relationship?
The reason for my question is, my hubby and I have some friends of ours, hes 45 shes 44. We think hes starting to go through a mid life crisis. Example, he has totally changed his hair style, (not something he normally does) and him and his wife came to our daughters recital, not only was he sporting a new hair do, but a gold chain around his neck as well! Looked to be straight out of the 70's, lol. Don't get me wrong, I'm not knocking him or anything, but just looked weird when he doesn't normally dress that way. Hubby and I couldn't help but think because of his age hes a prime candidate for the mid life thing. Which I think we all go through that at some point.
I was just wondering if anyone else experienced mid life crisis and what changes took place that was out of the norm and if or how it effected your relationship with your spouse. I read it can be a very critical time for a marriage too. Hopefully in our friends case if just the wearing of a gold chain and new hairstyle is all thats gonna happen, thats pretty dang good, but I think its just the start. Thanks for responses in advance.
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Well while I can't say I know what it is to be in the middle of life yet, I can say that My Dad went through something like this... Thank God he didn't start to sport a gold chain LOL but yeah...
He DID however get his ear pierced (now that was just some crazy sh*t for him for real!) and he did get a motorcycle, and he did work it with the ladies for a bit... um... probably because I'm his Kid I just thought it was wierd...
This went on for awhile... he took out the earring, sold the bike, ditched the chicka's and is as normal as he gets now... LOL Don't get me wrong I love my Dad like Mad.. but yeah it was odd.
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I don't need mid-life -- my WHOLE life has been in crisis!
My hubby tried to run away to another country. He sold some of our stuff when I was at work, bought a bicycle and a gun (!!) and packed his stuff so he could run away. What a BABY! I found out at work when the security guard called and told me that 'someone' left an envelope and keys for me at the desk. I get the envelope and it has the checkbook and the car was parked outside and I find his wedding ring and a video taped farewell at home. I was upset at the time (naturally) and then I was royally pissed, now I laugh about it. We are still married. That was 17 or 18 years ago. I got him into counseling when he came home (his load shifted on his bike and he got stuck a few miles away and had to call me to help him!!!)
Hopefully a few material things will get your friend through his crisis. There is nothing you can do but accept it and be there when/if his spouse needs a shoulder to cry on.
LOL thanks for the replies, thats some pretyy wild sh*t! Hokey I can accept it, its not that, its just that hubby and I thought it was weird cuz one week he was one way the next week he had done a turn around on a few things. They are not like real close friends of ours, but we know them and have invited them to some of our gatherings etc. I guess one thing that was so weird was the fact that hes our preacher! LOL, but preachers go through it too, they are human and no different from us not preachers,lol! But yeah weird to see him with a new younger hair do and sporting a gold chain.
Yeah, I had my M.L.C. in 1999 when I was 34 yrs old. Bought a Vette and moved from Detroit to L.A. That lasted about a year . I wanted to go out there and start a new life and "transmogrify" myself.
I think this MLC happens when you finally realize that life is short and you need to do some things you never got around to doing. Or when you figure out that you are not where you planned to be at this stage. That there should be something "more" or you are missing out.
LOL alpha 34? Guess it can happen early too. I guess when most people think of mid life they think of 40's. Guess its good it happened early for you, kind of got it out of the way!
Kindly do not look at this is an intrusion. I am a writer for a health and
fitness magazine in Dubai and I am currently doing a feature on men entering
MLC at an earlier age.
After reading this post, I was hoping you could give me some insight into
early MLC and why do you think it affects people spouse at such a young age.
Any form of help would be appreciated. Your name and details will be left
out of the research to maintain your privacy.
I think I as still going through MLF at age 48. I got a divorce about a year and a half ago. I think that MLC did definitely contribute to decision to get divorced, although I still believe I made the right decision.
Anyway since MLC, I started dating a much younger woman, got a fancy convertible sports car, started exercising regularly. Funny thing is that over the past couple of years since MLC started, I really have had to rethink my life and what is important in it. Despite getting a fancy sports car, and young GF, I do in fact realize that such things do not bring happiness to one's life.
Strangely enough since divorce my finances have improved greatly since my business has improved. I have dedicated myself toward being the best father I can be, and continuing to build my business and contributing to the community.
Please note: The suggestions and advice offered on this web site are opinions only and are not to be used in the place of professional psychological counseling or medical advice. If you or someone close to you is currently in crisis or in an emergency situation, contact your local law enforcement agency or emergency number.
. I wanted to go out there and start a new life and "transmogrify" myself.
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