Slow moving guys: How long until you said "I love you"?

yellowrose · 31st May 2005, 5:23 PM

I'm curious to know what the guys in here think. I'm dating a *very* slow mover, which is ok, but I'm concerned because I solidly know how I feel and he hasn't really said a peep yet, 4 months in.

How long do slow moving guys take to move to the next level?

::shrug::

simplyconfused · 31st May 2005, 5:49 PM

Im in the same situation, except that we been together for 7 months!Personally i think 4 months is not that long. Perhaps at the moment you should just look at the way he treats you then again i don't know if i should give any advice because im in even worse position (and it doesn't seem to be getting any better).

yellowrose · 31st May 2005, 5:53 PM

SC, I'm sorry to hear about your confusing situation.

Honestly, I have *no* complaints about the way he treats me. Not one. He's very affectionate, kind, sweet, great company...but he doesn't *say* anything about his feelings. It makes me wonder where I am in the scheme.

I'm wondering if the road is 100 miles long, and I'm at the 5 mile marker, if he's even left the driveway!

(Does that make any sense?)

TUDOR · 31st May 2005, 5:59 PM

I have only told 3 people in my life that I love them and I married two of them. I don't take the words lightly and made sure that when I said it that it was not lip service. Actions speak louder than words and if is treating you good and all is as it should be in your eyes then don't rush it. The fact that he has not said it just to make you happy or to get laid means he values the words "I love you".

Just be patient and rest assured that when he does say them he means them because he took his time and made sure. Two out of the 3 times I said it took me about 8 months or more. Patients.

alwayswondering · 31st May 2005, 6:11 PM

Maybe you should just come out and ask him how he feels, like start off in a joking way and then it will become more serious. You could be joking about something and say like, "you know you love me" and then watch his response.

good luck

simplyconfused · 31st May 2005, 8:57 PM

Yellowrose its amazing. Im in exactly the same situation. He also treats me well, but says absolutely nothing. Not even "I miss you". I really don't know what to make of it. Perhaps there are type of people which find it difficult expressing their feelings or maybe they don't feel that way yet. I wouldn't be worried if i were you though and i think the main thing is the way they treat you. Very often that's the best indicator as to how they feel. Tngirl few months and i think il have to follow your advice