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Old 3rd May 2005, 3:41 PM   #1
Herrera
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Is this controlling?

I am married for 6 years. My husband works on the house continuously. There is always something wrong with it. He doesn't relax at all. We both work full time jobs. We don't have any kids.

The problem is that he doesn't like when I come home from work from a full day and relax. I watch my soap opera that I taped. I make dinner for the both of us. I eat alone. He is always working on a project at home.

We just had a huge fight over the weekend because he wants me to clean the house every day when I get home from work. He would like me to clean atleast one room at a time instead of doing the hole house on the weekend when I am home. He doesn't like it that I sit on my butt watching t.v when I get home. Mind you, I am tired. I leave for work at 7:00a.m and get home at 6:00. (an hour drive)

I (like an idiot) agreed to it. But I am bothered by this. Am I wrong? Am I upset over nothing or does what he say's make sense?

Please help.

Thank you...
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Old 4th May 2005, 12:35 PM   #2
nugirl
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Hmm. It appears to me that there is no right or wrong here. Seems like you and your husband just have different work ethics. Has your husband always been like this? He sounds like a workaholic. That can be dangerous in a relationship.

What i suggest you do is this: Ask your husband to sit down and talk with you after work one day. Tell him that you just dont have the energy that he has and you would like to clean the house on the weekends and relax after work during the weeks. If he acts annoyed, ask him how he would feel if you insisted that he wait until the weekend to work on the house and until then-just sit and relax with you. He probably would not like you forcing your wants on him. If he still acts annoyed, tell him that you two just have different opinions but no one is right and no one is wrong. The only person who is wrong is the one who keeps trying to press their wants on the other person. Be very sweet and gentle when you approach him. Hope this helps.
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