[sweetness69]

I have been on here for awhile now but i rarely post anything. Well here is my dilemma I have been going out with

friend for about 5 months now. We started out as friends at our job and then turned into a couple. As friends we

were cool, but now its like we argue everyday, i believe our arguments come from misunderstanding and no

communication. Today we got into about him using my car going to his homeboys house when we are on Empty

and we dont have any loot right now. All i said was "how come you cant stay at home sometime when i am at work"

he went all out and got so mad at me this is what he says"uhhh what the ****" and some other ****. It's like other t

imes too when i say something he gets so frustrated at me and then he has the nerve to say its me and that I'm

the ****ed up one. In my relationships i believe in being open about whats bothering us. And i cant do that with

him. If i do come to him with something wrong i dont even curse at him or yell or even have a attitude with it, but

he says its the topic thats messed up i feel as long as i am coming at you in a respectable way and not cursing it

should be fine but its not. I just want to know from yall how do you bring up a issue to your spouse even if the

topic is ****ed up? And do any of yall get so frustrated at your spouse over stupid things? He does with me like

I irritate him or something if i want to go left and he wants right he gets mad if go my way.

please post something.

[curiousnycgirl]

I'm sorry I don't think you've written enough here for me to really comment. Are you two living together? If not why does he have access to your car? Why does he have your car regardless? To borrow your car, or use your shared car, and not fill the tank is simply rude/disrespectful/thoughtless/etc.

Did he lose his job? Is that why you guys don't have any money? Perhaps he is feeling insecure or inadequate over that.

I agree it is unfair to expect him to stay home while you work - but again not enough information to really know what's going on.

Can you write more? Some more background would help.

[sweetness69]

Ok we do live together and my check went to another place to stay and his check is late. That car is mine he doesnt have one . All i am saying is he knows we are damn near on E and thats for work ( he works too) instead he wants to B/S everyday when i am at work he doesnt like to stay home. Now before we were a couple he didnt have any transportation and when i brought that up he said"his babysmamma would pick him up" he acts like he is helping me out when really he is bringing me down. I payed the rent and my car note, insurance and utilites and he is staying with me I brought him in after he got evicted. And he has the nerve to say he is helpinig me out just because i have his name on my insurance cause he is older and it makes it alot cheaper, or maybe because he sometimes put gas in the car mostly i do and he just rides it out. Everytime he runs out of cigarettes who buys them I DO i do alot for him ya know. All i ask is for him to be more considerate of my feelings dont take things of out proportion. He has a very bad temper he has already pushed me and pushed me upside my head. its numerous things ya know.

[curiousnycgirl]

You know this is very not good for you. What exactly are YOU getting out of this relationship? Whatever it is it does not sound worth the price.

He is not getting frustrated with you - that implies you are doing something wrong. BULLSH*T. You have every right to express yourself, speak your mind, ask questions. He has a very bad temper that's it - end of story.

Get out before you it's too late. Let his baby's mamma take him back, or act as his chaffeur or whatever - you do not need his kind of crap!!!!

PLEASE do what you know you need to do.

[sweetness69]

See i cant get him to see that, when your in a relationship your suppossed to be able to express yourself and

feel comfortably around your spouse to address issues or whatnot. I am trying my hardest i dont try to argue

with him I try to reason with him and talk to him like we are suppossed to do. I cant sit around with stuff

bothering me and think everything is alright. But he was my friend first and i dont know how to stray from him

I never actually been alone before. I go from one relationship to another and have not healed. I just want him

to try to change his attitude and try to understand me more.. but if that doesnt work then he has to go

[curiousnycgirl]

He has to want to do those things, and it doesn't sound like he does. Please, please break up with this guy. Kick him to the curb!!!!!!!

You seem to be able to cover your expenses, perhaps being on your own would be very good for you. I know it was for me. You need to be comfortable and happy with yourself before you can be happy with someone else.

[sweetness69]

Thanks "curiousnycgirl"