[crrogers]

I was wondering if any of you had any tips:\


I am a 30 lb overweight 23 y/o white female. I am average looking at best but have a lot of flaws, mainly that I am missing 3 of my teeth (in locations that show.) In addition, I have screwed up my life thus far: I still live at home, have not gone to college, lost my car when I lost my job, smoke, etc.

When I was hanging out at a bar about 4 weeks ago a very nice looking young male approached me and we kind of hit it off. It turns out that he is 29 y/o and is a physician in residency (a clinical psychiatrist). He seems so nice and non judgmental. I become so scared when he comes over because his life is everything mine is not: he hasn't lived at home since 18, he is so independent (i.e., not clingy), has a great education, has no cosmetic flaws, etc. Although he doesn't call that often (he seems a little shy), he always asks how my day has been and wants to talk about me.

I am scared I am going to scare him off with my crazy behavior. For example, the other night we were kissing in my bedroom and I had the worst thought: that he was feeling my teeth with his tongue. I was stupid enough to ask him if he was doing that and he responded that he felt badly that I thought he was so "shallow." He went on to say something to the effect that he wasn't going to lie, my teeth weren't my best feature, but he didn't care that much about stuff like that....

I guess I am nervous about this relationship because he is the exact opposite of what I would ever expect to date, and I expect him to leave because he can probably get so much more. Does anybody have any ideas on how to stop these fears?

[HoldOn]

I think you will sabatoge this relationship if you don't take care of yourself first.

Why don't you get your life together and fix all the things wrong. Sounds like a big job, from what you've told me. Why don't you focus on your educaiton first. Today, take the first step to enrolling in a college for next fall or this summer. Break up these tasks into smaller steps and then you can accomplish them. (College might be most important, but if I were you I'd do whatever it took to get my teeth fixed first...)

Or probably, getting a job would be the first thing. So get off your @ss and do it!

Anyway, you have to save yourself first and then think of the good impact it will have on your relationship with guys.