[analyzetheworld]

I've never really posted anything like this kind of a question before, but I am not sure how else to do accurate research on this, and it is very important to me, so I'd greatly appreciate it if you women out there would respond.

I have recently been told that women are turned off by insecurity in men. Now, I can understand that, to a certain degree, because if a man is more insecure, he is more likely to be clingy, possibly abuse, and get jealous. However, what I also have been told is that women avoid even the hint of insecurity, so men should "fake" being secure, because this will attract women. My first reaction to this was that this must be the kind of thing that players do, in order to get women - to change themselves in order to attract women. According to my thinking, no one should change themselves; each person should accept the other, including good points, bad points, areas of confidence, and areas of insecurity. I really would like to know womens' takes on this; if they truly avoid insecure guys (even just a little) like the plague, or if they don't mind it, as long as the guy does not get abusive, jealous, etc., or if they even feel a closer bond with them, because they too may be insecure in some ways (each person can help the other)

A little bit of background on me may help to explain my reasons for asking this question. I basically grew up without a dad, and my mother was not very sensitive/feminine, and did not have a lot of time for me growing up...so, I had to learn to figure stuff out on my own. I have not had a lot of experience dating women, and am trying to educate myself, but want to know how best to go about it. However, when I heard that women stay completely away from insecure guys (of which I am to a certain degree), my first reaction was that I should just throw in the towel, because I would have to get everything in my life taken care of first, before attempting to date (as I refuse to be something that I'm not, just to attract women - I don't think it's fair to me or them). So, I would like to know how open you women are to being with someone who is working through issues in his life, and just being who he is.

Thanks a lot, in advance, for your time and input.