[EC]

I'm so drained guys....

I'm always here to give people hope and help them with their LDR's..but now I'm the one that needs the hope. I'm so tired already and emotionally drained, I am sad, miserable and lonely.

I mean I don't always feel this way..but for the past month I haven't been happy.

I need to vent....I'm tired of not having someone here to have and to hold, I'm tired of spending weekends alone, I'm tired of just having the phone to communicate, I'm tired of not being a part of his life up there.
I'm tired that during the week he is perfect with me and then the weekend routine starts and come Friday he's drunk by 3:00 in the afternoon and constantly partying all weekend. ( he says he goes out and drinks to forget how much he misses me) but I'm tired of hearing that too.

He's coming down next week for a whole week and yeah we are going to have a great time but then he's going to leave again and the routine will continue.

He's moving down here to be here forever in a couple months but I don't think I can take it anymore (but I have waited a whole year why give up now) (why not hold out a couple more months)

Lately I've been voicing my concerns but he thinks that lately I've become more whiney and jealous.

I love him I really do and now I am so confused. I don't know what to do? I'm just Blah.....