[rowi1116]

okay, it is friday night. yesterday my BF (of 7mos) told me he had made plans to go meet up with two of his friends (females, one who is married) from his old college. plans dont include me. should i be feeling upset like i am? much advice appreciated. this could be the first time i am ever upset at something in our relationship. what do i say? i havent said anything.

[CoolAunt]

Originally posted by rowi1116
okay, it is friday night. yesterday my BF (of 7mos) told me he had made plans to go meet up with two of his friends (females, one who is married) from his old college. plans dont include me. should i be feeling upset like i am? much advice appreciated. this could be the first time i am ever upset at something in our relationship. what do i say? i havent said anything.

Mine is probably an unpopular opinion here, but I think I would be upset about it. Imho, my bf can and should take me along if meeting up with a couple of other women, particularly on a Friday night. If this were a mid-week lunch date, it probably wouldn't bother me. Before anyone asks, no, we don't have to be joined at the hip and he should go out with the guys on a regular basis. As stated, that's my opinion and I'm sure I'll get blasted for it.

However, Row, I would try very hard not to make a big deal of it. Instead, since this is a first, I'd handle it as one and tell him (not tonight, later this weekend) that I felt jealous and excluded and I'd ask him if he would please invite me if he's ever invited out for an evening with the girls.

[Hund1976]

I agree he should have invited you. I wouldn't flip out about it though. Tell him that you felt bad that he didn't invite you, hopefully he'll be more considerate in the future then.

[HotCaliGirl]

I think he should have invited you too and that is unacceptable that there was another couple and a girl (for him?) while you were excluded, on a Friday night.... So you were supposed to just stay home thinking about him out there having fun? Men do all of this because women let them get away with it and it is hard for them to speak up, so if you are strong enough, you should say something definitely.

[rowi1116]

thanks everyone. so he called today and i mentioned it. and there was an appology. he asked to come over, but i didnt really want to see him so i told him no. It was hard to bring up in the first place. i made it clear that i was a touch jealous that he would do such a thing, even if they are two old friends, one who is married (she didnt bring her husband...friggin weirdos. i wonder if her husband is cool with that?). i guess we will talk more about it when i see him, which right now wont be until valentine's day, and thats fine with me because i am still upset. You ladies are right, my instinct was right, so i guess i shouldnt feel stupid. he then wrote me an email appologizing again.

this is our first issue in our relationship. i guess it is just strange having your first arguement with someone.

thanks again everyone!

[Hund1976]

Well if he's a good guy otherwise don't dwell on this too much. He apologized and as long as he's not doing anything else shady you should let it go now and move on with your relationship.