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WARNING:[/color] LONG! Also Contains rambling & relationship issues!!
Many of you have probably read my, " Is Marriage a Risk? " Topic in: Getting Married. I was very concerned with marrying my now ex-girlfriend ( 2 days of breakup ).
So now, ( Day 3 of being a Free Agent )
I don't know either to be happy or sad. This girl does have a piece of my heart; however I for one never expected to marry her. In our relationship we had alot of issues, but nothing we couldnt work around. A lot of the problems we had were because she was unhappy. I hardly ever brought up issues, unless I really got bogged down about them. I would like to briefly draw a typed diagram of how our relationship happened over the course of 3yrs...
Basically Year 1 was all good, we explored sex, took a very expensive Disney Vacation in the summer, but at the end of the year we fell off. She was turning 21 and I was still only 20 (So you know where that's going). Come New Years, I wanted to make plans to be with her on a romantic night and end with watching the ball drop etc etc. She however did not want that and wanted to go out partying; which was all fine and dandy after a small arguement we had. I let her have her way. Come the Eve, her plans flopped and she was left home alone, I was out with my friends and she was jealous. She called me and tried to ruin my night, after yelling at me for wanting to go drinking.
Take into consideration though, many of the times she wanted to go out drinkin', partyin', clubbin', 95% of the time hr plans were dumbed, her friends were always all talk. So usually when she made plans to go out; I'd be out with my own set plans and she'd blow up my phone wanting me to leave my friends. Which I ended up doing most of the time... /sigh
Just to note her words, " If I cant be with her ( bestfriend ); I dont want to be with you. "
I threw that in her face, and hung up on her and turned my cell phone off. Didnt call her for a week as I was so upset with her. So into year 2, was basically the real downer, she had shown her selfish side full blown, sex sucked, she was very needy of me, always wanted me to go to her home: never came to mine. So I went into a depression where I wouldnt call her for weeks at a time. I'd avoid phone calls and what not. I got into MMORPGs ( Mass Multiplayer Online Role Playing Games ) and blocked her out, I did exactly what she did to me. Of course we had big arguements about it and I soon stopped it.
So onto Year 3, I started thinking about my current standings with her. 80% of the time she was always in a pissy mood, she was easily aggrivated. Always upset at something and tried to take the blame out on me. Became VERY materialistic. Where it isn't an issue with me to be, because I shower'd her with gifts all the time, even though I'd get mid-end gifts, she ALWAYS got the best. This last X-mas she finally went all out, and I got her this very nice $600.00 diamond heart braclet (On Sale for 4). She HATED it, she wanted me to return it for this cheapo 100 dollar braclet that looked exactly like it. I thought, by getting her the, "pretty" one she'd enjoy it more. Was wrong... That's when I knew it wouldnt work...
My Problems,
Dont call all the time... I'm not a big phone person, I'd rather have a relationship where I see my partner more than I call them. I mean I'll talk on the phone, but I'd rather SEE you... Don't get me wrong I'd call everyday; or if I missed a day because of being sick or sleepin' in I'd call early in the morning the next day!
This is the only problem she has had with me,
Most of our arguements were based on my calling...
Her Problems, ( the kicker )
Selfish - During sex, she's all about.. " Do you. " She likes quickies... (20mins) I'm more along the lines of 1hr.... Occassionally I'll be into quickes like during the day or something.
But not at night when the passion is steamy! She rarely puts any effort into foreplay; while I did everything you could imagine to please...
To further eloborate, if you are fimilar with female squirters? I've turned her into one. Basically how to experience a REAL female orgasm etc etc... More on it, she gets more pleasure with me, than while masturbating! That being said, I do take great pride in my work under the sheets!
If she has to give it's half assed, If I complain it's an arguement. I don't want to force her, but what am I do to if my expectations aren't being met here by simple requests? Am I to feed her till she's full and get a bone to suck on in return? Hmfp...
Moody & Easily Aggrivated - Enough said, I can't deal with a moody person. I always have a smile on my face, and if you're always this way or easily ticked... I know for sure it wont work...
Too Spontaneous - I'm simple in a complex way, she's always trying to do new things; yet wont try things she wont like, but will try outrageous things. For instance, She has a job now, good pay etc etc; however she picked up 2 part-time jobs, intotal 3 jobs. For no F'in reason. She wanted to, " try it. " Ugh, stupid things like that!
( However, I do love to try new things, but if I know they are going to result in physical or mental strain COMMON SENSE, I won't do them: like the 1 full time and 2 part time jobs? Who does that if they dont need to? )
Always going to see her, but she rarely comes to see me...
I have a very loving family, very diverse; much more so than hers, and after 3 freakin' years she still doesnt feel comfortable? COME ON, that makes NO SENSE. I've spent DAYS at her home with her, literally kiddnapped if you will. She has not once spent the night over my home in 3 freakin' years. I can literally COUNT the number of times she's been to my home. I can ALSO say I've gone to get her, and literally had to come home on my own behalf to pick something up; I can say she's been to my house on those terms, more so than she has come on her own free will.
She only comes to my house for personal gain. To pick somethng up she needs, etc.... And there's so much more I can add to it!!
So yah, 2 totally different people. - Speaking of which, I think she was only with me for that reason. If we had kids, they were garuntee'd a loving DAD. She'd always have a roof over her head, etc etc. Hmfp...
I do need someone else. Anyone out there looking for that special person too?
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