Hey guys,

I am curious, from a man and a woman's perspective, should a woman foot the bill on the first date? Personally I rarely pay on the first date, but now I am wondering if that gives men a bad impression. I have no problem paying once I start dating someone but I've always felt awkward on a first date. i have offered to pay in the past and always get told he'll take care of it, so now I dont even offer.

Is it curteous to offer to pay? Guys, how do you feel when a girl does not offer to pay?

[Merin]

My Take on it is this...

If a girl asked the guy out, then she should pay.
If the guy asked the girl out, then he should pay.

If I was going out on a first date and the guy had asked me.. then I would assume he planned on paying for the date and honestly it wouldn't occur to me, to offer to pay for a date that I had been invited on.

[Sarah12385]

i offer almost all the time unless it's my birthday or valentine's day

if he says "no i got it" then ok!



~Sarah~

[Kat]

Another for whoever asks the person on the date pays.

I wouldn't accept if I couldn't afford it, that way I would be able to at least offer.

[johnnyapples]

I think there are no real rules here. For a girl, I think it is always nice to say if they should pay or at least try to split the bill. If you genuinely like the guy, to make him feel comfortable, try to split the bill, but it doesn't have to be 50/50, just offer to pay something. Be genuinely interested in how much everything is.

Some guys might be offended. Some guys might think the girl is trying to say that she isn't interested. But its easy to get around that -- a girl just has to smile and say, "hey ... I have a job too ..." or if you decide to let him pay, and you like him, insist that you must pick up the next dinner, otherwise you'll be mad at him.

All of these lines are just a way to let the guy know its okay who pays for it and that there isn't any pressure to go a fancy restaurant or always to pick up the tab. It actually makes the girl more attractive, in my opinion.

[katie79]

i agree with merin,

whoever asks is the one that pays.

when you ask somebody to accompany you for the evening, it's an invite and you are supposed to treat them.

usually, at least in my experience, the man is the one to ask out, therefore, he pays for the evening. but that's just me.

i recipricate with my fiance. mostly, he pays when we go out (we never go anywhere big or expensive though), but I treat him to dinner and drinks too.

traditionally speaking, if the man pursues the dating, then he should be treating her for the first 3 dates, then they can recipricate. same for a relationship.

and i know that i said this, it will become very controversal amongst men complaining it isn't fair. please don't attack me !