My boss's daughter

Eddie Lopez · 12th January 2005, 4:32 AM

Hello
Ok how do i start well I guess from the begining would be good, you see i've been at my current place of employment for just over a year now. When i first started working here I was working with my boss's daughter. When we worked together we would talk, but our friendship was limited to just those times that we would see eachother at work. Since she goes to school the only time I really see her now is on breaks and sometimes on the weekends. I have only known her for a year, but lately i have been having romantic feelings for her.

So now I get to my problems that I need help with.

1.First of all I have goten to know her father (my boss) very well, as a matter of fact at this momemt i am closer to her father than i am to her. I want to persue a relation ship with her but i dont want to disrespect her father (my boss, and my friend)
2. Since i realize that i have these feelings for her i have been trying to just talk to her, but all of a sudden she seems so reserved. I dont know why, I havent let on how i feel and i've told no one.
3. This is probably the biggest problem but the only one i can cope with. Well the problem is that she is still in High School, and lets just say I graduated from High School about 3 years ago. I mean three years is not a big deal, but when one of the parties involved is still considered a minor i guess it is.

So I need help, i want to persue a relationship with her, but at the same time stay cool with her dad (my boss, and friend), and keep my job. Anybody have any advice?

jellybean · 12th January 2005, 4:49 AM

They all know how you feel about her...they can tell by your body language, the way you try to talk to her all the time, etc...I'm betting her and her Dad have discussed this, and agreed you are not a good match for her - that's why she's turned cold.

_Saffy_ · 12th January 2005, 5:54 AM

Quote:

I'm betting her and her Dad have discussed this, and agreed you are not a good match for her - that's why she's turned cold.

i doubt this is the case at all, why would the father be friends with you if he thought you were no good?

just carry on being friends and see what happens, she may be busy at school, or any number of things right now.

but if you value your job, i think it would be better to look elsewhere, because if you did date the bosses daughter and it didnt work out, then you may find that you need to get yourself a new one.

Eddie Lopez · 12th January 2005, 6:36 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by jellybean
They all know how you feel about her...they can tell by your body language, the way you try to talk to her all the time, etc...I'm betting her and her Dad have discussed this, and agreed you are not a good match for her - that's why she's turned cold.

I doubt that they know, for one i am always aware of my body language sometimes over aware. I should have been more clear about when i try to talk to her, it's not like i'm blowing up her cell phone or anything, as a matter of fact i have never called her, I only talk to her when i see her, and right now thats not very often

_Saffy_ you may be right, i know that she's really busy with school right now, she has her finals to study for, plus she on two different sports teams, and sometimes she has volunteer work to do. And as far as my job goes i'm willing to risk it, if it means a chance at a great relationship.

Eddie Lopez · 30th January 2005, 1:01 AM

Ok just a little update on my situation. I'm still crushing on my bosses daughter; I was able to work with her today, and she was a lot more talkative, and open. It's still just small talk between us, so I want to invite her to hang out, so that we can get to know each other better. I want to go in a group so that we are both comfortable, and it dose'nt feel like a date, but we have no common friends. Any I ideas on this?

Sunny3715 · 30th January 2005, 3:14 PM

What type of environment do you work in? If you guys don't have any mutual friends are there other people from the workplace you could get together with and then invite her along? That way everyone would feel comfortable and you could get to know her a little more before jeopardizing your job situation.... or the friendship with her dad.

Eddie Lopez · 30th January 2005, 3:40 PM

That sounds like a good idea i already hang out with some people from work , and she knows them so it works out. Thanks for the suggestion, now i just have to figure out ware to hang out.

Sunny3715 · 30th January 2005, 3:47 PM

By the way, you gave some really good advice in a "friends with benefits" post. Granted I am in a quite different situation as most of the "friends with benefits" posts on here.... You said, "Well i going to leave you with somthing i tell everybody "we chase that which runs from us" Does this really work when it comes to guys??

Eddie Lopez · 31st January 2005, 3:41 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Sunny3715
By the way, you gave some really good advice in a "friends with benefits" post. Granted I am in a quite different situation as most of the "friends with benefits" posts on here.... You said, "Well i going to leave you with something i tell everybody "we chase that which runs from us" Does this really work when it comes to guys??

Well i'm glad i can help. Now i've never tried it out on a guy, but it should work. You may have to apply it in a different way than i would but the basic theory is the same. But if you have a fwb situation i don't know if it will work the same way. All i can tell you is it has work for me when i was just looking for a fling. If you want i'd say rent the movie "The Tao of Steve" that's ware i got it from.

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I talked to her again today, and i said that we should all hang out sometime, and she said yeah. I would have set something up right there but, I got a call from my friend, he was calling to say that he got hurt and would not be able to work or go out for a while, and the other people I work with well, one went back to school, two are going on vacation for a week. Basically it looks like i'm gonna have to wait to do that group thing.
I have been seeing her more frequently though, i'm getting to know her little by little. We might be getting to that point that we can hang out just the two of us. Either way, i'm gonna have to wait a little bit longer.

Oh yeah I do have her number, would it be a good idea if i called her just to talk? And should i tell her that i'm gonna call? I feel like a dork for asking that but, this crush has me all confused, I cant think straight.

april · 31st January 2005, 5:30 AM

Why are obsessing/in lust with your boss's UNDER-AGE daughter?

And stop calling him your friend, your boss is not your friend - he is your boss.

You posted previously about how incredibly short you are for a man, do you also have the mind-set of a much younger person? or are you just a pervert?

Eddie Lopez · 31st January 2005, 4:35 PM

I was trying not to go into details but i guess i will, the whole age issue, it's not like i'm 27 and shes 16, there is only a difference of three years between us. And her being a minor is not a problem because she turns 18 this year. And why cant my boss be my friend, we drink together, we hang out, we help eachother out when we can. I dont see why we cant be freinds just because he's my boss. And as a matter of fact i do have the mind-set of a young person, i'm only 20.

Teag · 31st January 2005, 5:33 PM

Thats not a beig deal on the age. I don't know about where your from but in my state your no longer a minor once you turn 17(although you still can't buy ciggs) You can do whatever you want & your parents can't do anything. (press charges ect...) You are at a consent age to have sex, move out whatever. I say go for it, if you like her & she's not blowing you off ask her out. If you don't feel comfortable about the boss situation, you can always ask him. Say something like I think your daughter is very sweet & I think we have alot in common would like to ask her out, would that be ok with him. If he's your friend he probably won't mind as long as you haven't given him any reason not to trust you w/ his daughter (told him past stories about realtioships ect...) Good Luck

Eddie Lopez · 31st January 2005, 9:37 PM

Well i have told him past stories, but i'm not worried about that, he knows that i was committed to my last girl friend and i loved her very much. I've also told him that my days of "playing" girls are over, and that i'm looking for something more than someone to screw. I want to see if there is anything between me and his daughter first, if there is i will ask for his consent.

Sunny3715 · 1st February 2005, 4:24 AM

I agree that it could be a good idea to see if there could be anything there between you and her before asking his consent.... BUT, what if you guys hit it off very well and then you ask his consent and he says he doesn't like the idea.... then what? Do you just back off after getting a taste of what you are really missing??? OR go for it anyway???

Eddie Lopez · 2nd February 2005, 3:07 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Sunny3715
BUT, what if you guys hit it off very well and then you ask his consent and he says he doesn't like the idea.... then what? Do you just back off after getting a taste of what you are really missing??? OR go for it anyway???

Thats a good question, but it's something i'd have to discuss with her. Personally I know for a fact that i would give it all up for someone that i love. If we hit off very well, it's not a question of if i would go for it, it's a question of if she's willing to go against her dad. If it ever came to that point, and she decides to break it off, then... I don't know. All i can say is i'm no stranger to pain.... then again.... i'm a fighter.

But i don't think it will ever get to that point, I know her dad, and when it comes to his kids his a little old fashion. He believes that he should know, and like the guy, before the guy starts going out with his daughter. Since i get along with him very well, i'm not worried about what he would say. When it comes to her father the only thing i'm worried about is, I don't want to hide anything from him. The person i think i should be worried about is her mom, her mom knows me, but i don't know what her mom thinks about me. I'm not so concerned about this because, so far the girls i've gone out with, would go against their mom before their dad..