[midori]

Hi everyone,

I want to comment on a pattern I have noticed in some discussions here on LoveShack.org, especially those pertaining to relationships that involve infidelity.

LoveShack.org is an open community dedicated to providing advice and support for people with interpersonal relationship problems. As such, the community welcomes all views that are offered with a sincere wish to help. People have different styles, and different ideas about a given situation. Sarcasm, constructive criticism, and even respectfully voiced disapproval can all be appropriate -- provided they are employed with the intent of being helpful by providing insight or a different perspective that will help the poster with his or her dilemma.

However I've noticed that frequently in some discussions members respond to a post in order to voice their own emotions about a similar issue that they are involved in, or to validate their own feelings and choices, or even in some cases to simply berate, mock, or derogate the poster.

This particular forum is focused on discussing the problems and experiences of those who are in relationships with cheating partners, or who are themselves cheating on their partners. It is certainly appropriate for others who are not in such a situation to offer their insight to posters here; however, it is only appropriate if it's done in a respectful and helpful manner.

"Respectful and helpful" does not mean that you must condone or encourage a poster. It does not mean that you must agree with the poster. Respect is the key. We cannot list every conceivable sentence, phrase, or word that a person could post, and declare whether or not it is acceptable. Our rules prohibit personal attacks (see our guidelines for a definition: http://www.loveshack.org/forums/guidelines), but you must also adhere to the larger philosophy of the site, which is to provide support and assistance. If your response is not posted in that spirit, chances are it will be deemed inappropriate.

Thanks for your cooperation.

Best wishes,
midori