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Fear of Being Alone?!?!

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Breaks and Breaking Up It happens to most everyone at some point in life! Share your experiences!

 
 
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Old 1st December 2004, 8:55 PM   #1
Isabella82
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Unhappy Fear of Being Alone?!?!

Does anyone ever feel like they are going to be alone forever? I feel like this sometimes. I feel like I am never going to be in love again, and that I will be alone til I die. Is this a pretty common fear or am I the only one?
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Old 1st December 2004, 9:01 PM   #2
igiveup
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Unhappy

I feel the same way. I thought I had paid my dues. I thought I had finally found someone and was going to be happy. Now I am alone and he has a g.f and it is happy.
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Old 1st December 2004, 10:10 PM   #3
JackieQ
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hugs

Hugs ... and more Hugs...yes it's common and there's no magic answer. Hang in there.
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True bravery is arriving home drunk after a very late night out with the boys..... Then.....being assaulted by your wife with a broom, And still having the guts to ask: "Are you cleaning, or were you flying somewhere?"
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Old 1st December 2004, 10:29 PM   #4
hurtingandconfused
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Quote:
Does anyone ever feel like they are going to be alone forever?
I don't

Quote:
I feel like I am never going to be in love again, and that I will be alone til I die.
And I do not love again it is because I choose not to.


I felt as you did when my heart was broken. But within time you'll start to realize that there are LLOOOTs of people out there. All it takes is for one person to "complete" your life.
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Old 1st December 2004, 11:19 PM   #5
mj108
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Isabella82---I do have a fear of being alone for the rest of my life. I know exactly how you feel. I think a lot of it has to do with---I'm 34 years old! My career is going great & everything else but my love life sucks. That's why I'm hoping & praying that 2005 will be the greatest for the LoveShack gang!

hurtingandconfused---I need your attitude!
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Old 2nd December 2004, 8:07 AM   #6
nat1838
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I feel the same way, it is definetely not just you. I went seven years between my last boyfriend and the one who just left me. I am terrified it will be another 7 or never again. I feel like theres something wrong with me. I am also absolutely terrified that if I do find someone else they won't make me as happy as this last one did. I have never been so happy in my life as I was with him. It's scary, but I just have to pray that it won't be that way.
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Old 2nd December 2004, 8:20 AM   #7
beejsea2
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A little over a month ago when my BF left me ;I think the fear of being alone was what bothered me more than my bf leaving.

All my friends though have reassured me when I'm ready to find someone new I'll have no problems finding one. So when I'm ready to move on I will...one lesson I've learned is that I can not and will not live my life for someone else. I'm still reconnecting with friends that I neglected because of my ex.

Take this alone time now to work on you, take care of you!!
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Old 2nd December 2004, 10:57 AM   #8
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I feel the same way....my father died at 39yrs. My mother lived the rest of
her life alone.....Plus I'm old (not too, but some 50+) and my MM leaving and being in my life for 20 yrs makes me think that I will follow her to the grave also, ALONE.
My sister says God has a plan for me when this all came tumbling down a week ago today, I pray that the "PLAN" is for me to be happy, not alone, and at peace.
Is that asking too much....?? I deep down think it does...and that hurts.
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Old 2nd December 2004, 12:24 PM   #9
beejsea2
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DoggyDog I'm sorry for your pain!! But being alone doesn't mean we have to live a life of not at peace or happy!! I have to remember that myself sometimes!!

I have a sister in her early 50's and she hasn't had a serious relationship for many years...she told me that she didn't have to be in a relationship to be happy or feel good about herself!!

For 4 years I lived my life around my ex...he walked out on me and left nothing but a note that contradicted itself...one of the first things I said after he left was I don't want to be alone!! I know that I'll be better off in the long run without him. Before he moved in I was alone for about 8 years after I ended a relationship with a man involved with drugs...I was independent happy and I'm going to find that person again!!
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Old 2nd December 2004, 12:29 PM   #10
Just Visiting
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Hey....I have been there too. My ex left me with no explanation, nothing. It took a lot to get through that. But I did. And now I am with someone who is sooo much better than my ex. My new guy came at a time when I knew I was done grieving over my ex. So don't give up.
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Old 2nd December 2004, 12:36 PM   #11
Isabella82
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Yeah I hear a lot of advice, such as it happens when you least expect it, and when your finally over your ex. But I've been told that before and found my ex when I least expected it. I am only almost 22, and feel like I will never again share my life with someone that made me so happy. I know I can be okay by myself and maybe right now thats what I need. But life is so much more happier and brighter when you are in love with someone.
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Old 2nd December 2004, 12:54 PM   #12
beejsea2
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Isabella,

Yes life can be better when you have someone to share it with. But at 22 your too young to have thoughts of gloom and doom. When I was 22 I was too busy finishing school and starting my career to even think about a relationship. You have plenty of time to find Mr. Right but you won't find him if you don't take care of yourself first and more importantly love yourself!!

Last edited by beejsea2; 2nd December 2004 at 12:57 PM.
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Old 2nd December 2004, 2:03 PM   #13
on the edge
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Quote:
Originally posted by DoggyDog
My sister says God has a plan for me when this all came tumbling down a week ago today, I pray that the "PLAN" is for me to be happy, not alone, and at peace.
Is that asking too much....?? I deep down think it does...and that hurts.
it does hurt....i feel exactly the same. all i have ever wanted was to share life and all it's experiences with someone special. don't care for riches, fame or glory. just a beautiful and loving relationship/marriage.
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Old 2nd December 2004, 3:21 PM   #14
DoggyDog
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Beej/Edge and All

A song is playing right this very minute and the lyrics are so true...My workstudy
said its called "The Reason by Hoobastank"....The words are so right this very minute....".A reason to change who I use to be and start over new."....let's tell ourselves that every minute every day....til we start to believe it....I think I will.

Love ya, DD
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Old 2nd December 2004, 3:37 PM   #15
beejsea2
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This morning I received an email from a friend that I hadn't talked to in a while and I gave him the latest...his response made me feel good...

He said "You're a gem and special and storms like these do not last forever"

So everyone remember this too will pass!! Hopefully sooner than later
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