He wants space, i gave him space, after that, I got pushy, he got mad. PLS Read
OK so he gave me the " I need space" crap last month. At first i was a mess..........then i was OK....now I'm a mess again.........
After he wanted his space I pushed and pushed to get some answers out of him. Which in the end pushed him away. So i told myself that i wasn't going to sit home and sulk. So i had the time of my life going out and partying. Then i realized " Hey, this space thing wasn't such a bad idea"
So i guess my ex saw that it was making me as upset as it did in the beginning. So then he started going " I miss you" I just want things to be OK" So i fell for it and we were "together" just living in separate places. (we lived together for about a year and a half before this). But we decided that he was going to go out with his friends and have his fun and me the same. So when i slept there the other night i heard him talking on the phone to his friend about a girl that he was messing with at the bar. When i confronted him, he panicked and game me some BS. So he got all defensive and told me to leave. So we barely talked that day and i talked to him at night and he still seemed bothered that i got mad that he said something to this girl ( i think he told her she has a nice ass) So yesterday i called him all day, everything seemed fine....until.....i start asking questions again. He said that all the sex we've been having and the togetherness was fogging up my vision of where we stand" So I said " What are we just f***ing?" BLAH BLAH BLAH. I think that he is just one confused man. When i go out and give him his space that he wants (obviously NC works) he gets upset and cries through the night. Now that I'm getting pushy again, he tells me we're not together stop asking questions and the fights about why we broke up surface and were back to square 1. Should i do NC AGAIN?
To make a long story short, he got his space, got upset when i wanted the space as well, now that i dont want space and want things to be normal with us, he gets all weird and thinks that space is still needed (when i dont want it anymore).
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I want to be the one he looks at, then smiles and says to his friends--that's her...
Last edited by IhavenoFREAKINclue; 30th November 2004 at 9:03 AM.
I am sorry to say, it sounds like a game to me. He is very confused and it sounds like he wants to have his cake and eat it too (not have to be committed to you but not let anyone else have you either). If he wants space, I say give it to him. No togetherness, no sex, no sappy love talk unless he's ready to take it seriously again.
I agree he's trailing you around and your letting him.
He wanted his space and he got it. Of course once you did it too he freaked out only because he wants to have his cake and eat it too. He's definitely not ready to commit fully to you and if you want a serious relationship with him it will not happen now.
If you keep up the game you will just tire the relationship till the point that it's so messed up nothings left. The respect for eachother dissappears and your left with nothing.
I suggest you NC all the way. No contact, no sex, no nothing. If he calls you back don't fall for it so eaily again. Make him prove that he is serious this time and that you don't have time to waste with him unless he is serious and tell him just like that.
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The male brain is more compartmentalized than the female brain. Men can seperate things whereas women have a harder time cause their brains are all wired together in some inter-connected mish-mosh.
I feel so sorry for you. I hate guys that play that game. It's such a double standard. I say give him back his dang space. Get the ball rolling in your court again. Give him a couple days and when you ignore him and he tries to talk to you, you can totally bring up the girl with the nice butt he didn't want to talk about.
I think he was mostly just embarassed and that's why he acted like a jerk. I have never known a guy that can admit he is wrong gracefully.
Why don't you initiate no contact or "space" this time, go have fun and don't talk to him untill his freaking games are over. Give him a taste of his own medicine, you said you we're having fun right? So why deal with his sh@*? Or Maby it's time to move on.
Oh yeah, also, he thinks i don't care b/c I'm out partying and having a good time. He expects me to sit home lock my self in the bathroom and cry til hell freezes! To him, that shows that I care. F*** THAT SH*T I'm goin OUT!!!!!!!
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