[girl_in_nyc]

Firstly, a big thank you for all of the responses I received.

It's been a week since I confronted him about this. It boiled down to his way of dealing with frustrations in the relationship. I told him that it was not an acceptable way to deal with hard issues, that he needed to COMMUNICATE those things with me, that he'd f*cked up really badly if he truly meant that he loved me, etc.

In the meantime, I had a bunch of out-of-town guests who I had to entertain, so for about 5 days, my mind didn't have very much time to process everything. Which is not to say I didn't think about these things. I also did talk to him over the phone, asking him more questions, trying to get answers to the myriad of questions I had about his actions (he's sorry, but I told him I wanted a written formal apology - I'm big into letters), his past, what he thinks, etc.

What I think I've decided to do is to give it another chance. He's said that he took down all his online profiles; part of me wants to ask him to prove it to me. I think the thing that irks me is that it'd be one thing if we broke up and we BOTh gave it our all, but he didn't. maybe my logic is all screwed. but at least if we both tried and we later broke up, it'd be all in all, a much more positive experience. Does that make sense?

Anyway, I know I may be being vague, but trying to be more specific while at work isn't easy!
If you have specific ?s, I'll do my best to try to answer them asap.

I think if you all work it out that you should maybe still keep and eye open just incase he was to do it again. If he did aplogize to you, that should be enough. I don't think you should ask him to give you a written note stating he is sorry. You will know anyway if he truly is sorry or not, wheather he was to do this again or not. Good luck.