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When is it time to END a friendship?
I need help!! This board has offered me comfort and solace before and I'm turning to it again. My question for all you wise people, is when is it time to end a friendship?
I have been friends with someone I met while in school, we never really talked much until this past year. She is very selfish and closed off at times, yet she is a sweet person if that makes sense. She recently started dating this guy who is very mentally abusive towards her and has done nothing but make her cry - and this has gone on for months - but, being a good friend - loving, loyal - I've stuck it thru with her - always listening to her and giving her advice when needed. The friendship became very lopsided with me giving alot more than receiving. Not that I have to get back something to be a good friend, but it would be nice to have an EQUAL friendship.
All this hell went on for months - her self-esteem was low, she always talked about what she needed and if I needed anything, it was always sort of thrown to the side. She says she tries to be there when she can and I believe her. I have been the only friend she's had - who she could turn to and soon, I seemed to be giving her advice almost daily. something I do not like to do - but it always ended up that way.
Now that she seems to be finding her own voice and seeing that the guy she dated is using her - she seems to have all this anger within her. TOday, when she called me - it wasn't even to say hi or thank you for the birthday present, but to STOP lecturing her and that I don't respect her and that I Don't listen to her - when, all I've done for her all this year is EXACTLY that!!
It pissed me off and I told her I felt angry and offended that she could even say these things since she only seems to call when she needs something - her comments about how she feels towards me throw me for a loop and I end up getting hurt since the whole time, I've done nothing but be her friend and listen and love her.
I have not had to deal with this type of person in AGES - my inner gut keeps saying to let the friendship go - should I now follow this? I am a truly nice person, always tried to put myself in her shoes etc...I'm just not sure we are compatible - what do you all say? I think most of the time I feel bad with her than good - this must be a sign.
Would you end this friendship - nicely but end it? Thanks for the input!!
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