[elle naturelle]

Ok... I have never used a forum, but need some input... male or female input... becuase this is driving me nutts.

I dated this guy when I was 19 for a few months before I headed to Europe for 2 years. We had the best time together but were young and persuing our own goals at the time. Everything was amazing though.

About four months ago (I am now 26) I decided to send him letter with some pictures to see how he was doing. I figured since after 3 months I didnt hear anything, he was not interested in seeing me.

Well... three weeks ago he called me and asked me to meet him and some friends at the bar. After my meeting and visiting with my friends, I obliged. We hit it off.. had a great night and thoroughly enjoyed each others company. Not only are we mentally in sync but physically.

A few days later I sent a little text message to his cell saying I had a great time. Call me sometime when he was free. We both have very busy lives, several companies on the go and a lot to offer one another. He responded an hour later with a "hello, Im busy, message you tomorrow". The next day he messaged my to invite me on a day/road trip to Whistler. i was busy so he asked me to see him the following Saturday. Well teh next day, Friday, he texted me with a cute little message. The messaging progressed to him inviting me over for a drink, eventhough we were scheduled to meet the following day. I said I had a meeting until 9 and would text him then. At five to 9 he messaged me, making sure I was still coming. I went to his place, we had a great night, went on a hike the next morning and left to do our own thing for the afternoon.

We had planned to meet at 10 that night, and he would call me around 9 to give the head up. At 8 he called to give me all the details. I met him around 10 and we had a great night with him and his friends. Spent the night together again and slept in until noon. At around 1 I told him I was going to grab a coffee and snack down the street before heading home and I would see him soon. He offered to come with me, put his arm around me the whole time, kissed me, held me, everything IN PUBLIC. Before parting I said it was nice meeting his friends, etc. In fact, I thought for a moment that he was going to ask me away for the long weekend. I had no expectations. this was Sunday.

On Tuesday I sent a text saying I had a fun weekend, message me when you have some free time. Ps. Im still not wearing any panties (personl joke).

It is Thursday and still no response.

Is he scared, not interested or what??? PLEASE BE HONEST and let me know your thoughts.

[crazycatwoman]

hi

im thinking he could be using you as a booty call ....... i assume you slept with him when you spent the night ......well did you ever not sleep with him when you seen him? i always think giving it up to easy is a mistake....... its not what your average woman really wants to do, and we ( women) almost always expect more then to be ****ed..... and alot of the time the guy just wanted sex

i wonder if he had some other girlfriend when you contacted him, and thats why he was so abrupt when he messaged you "hello, Im busy, message you tomorrow"??? maybe its hard fitting your both in ....... ????

I think if you see him again, you should keep your clothes on, and then if he calls you back, he probably really likes you , it would be a easy way to tell .......

now thats assuming you slept with him ...........

as for my other thoughts.......... it could be he is a really decent guy, but its just moving a little fast, to have a history and get back together after years and years has to be a bit odd for both of you ........ i would try to see him again but do something where u can really talk .......not that im saying you havent, im saying really try to get deep in there............

also maybe im just too suspitious and he is just really decent and really busy....... but if he does not contact you soon , after apparently fitting back together so well and having such a good time with you.........he probably used you or is finding it hard to get into it

but you did state he has alot of demands on his time......soooooooooo i would just text him again, saying hey im missing you or something sweet.....dont be like WHERE ARE YOU BLAH BLAH BLAH...........that will only make you look deperate ..... play it cool

[elle naturelle]

Thanks a lot.

Im pretty sure he doesnt have a girlfriend, one of his businesses does require evenings a couple of times per week... but if he does, well, there is nothing I can do about that. I refuse to play homewrecker.

And yes.. we do sleep together... but it is SOOO good. =)

As for the pressure or fear that men seem to face, I dont want to use that as an excuse for him but at the same time I really hope that is the issue.

When I was over at his place, he, his roommate and I had a conversation about booty calls and my opinion... I said, it is fine as long as you are honest and communicate that openly with the girl. He didnt say anything to me, and in fact, asked if I as ever in that position and how I felt abou tit.....then we spent the entire day Sunday together, without morning or day sex like we have traditionally had in the past.

If he is busy and wants to slow things down, Im ok with that... but what is a simple text message to say hello even though I explicitly stated "message me when you have some free time". And, how long will a guy wait to return or make a little call?

Isnt it too early to ask him about what he is doing with me and my feeling? Should I just wait another week if i decide to send him another note? I too am skeptical of relationships and only want a happy, healthy life withsomeone who values me as much as I value them

Keep the input coming and I will be sure to respond diligently.

Thanks everyone. =) These forums are great!

[crazycatwoman]

i do agree is very early in the relationship to express any direct comments about what is he doing with your feelings and what not.........that would make you seem very insecure ........ but it is not too early since u are having sex with this man....to expect him to contact you and let you know what is going on

so thats why i said contact him ........dont lay some law down or something about how he needs to call you and blah blah blah .......just get in contact and feel it out .....

as far as your refusal to play homewrecker......... i applaud you ......the world needs more women (and men) like you ..........

he may not owe you a commtment, or promises, but he always owes your respect , remember that......... so just contact him and see what he says.....

if he is weird i would just write him off or distance myself and look at other possibilites.......if he is not "with" you , you have every right to consider other relationships also.....so dont limit yourself if that is how he feels......

[ellabella]

Have you heard from him yet? If you haven't, you should contact him through email or text messaging and ask him if you just should take a hint and not bother him anymore or if everything is all right... They freak out sometimes and they need a push to say "Yes, I freaked out" or "Not, everything is cool". But I wouldn't do anything more than that....... If there is no answer --forget about him...