[jerryinva]

I am beginning to see I am less the victim, and more the antagonist here. She called me last night, again, and it was late, so I answered...and she was stressing over some stuff, which is fine...that is a friend type of deal. Then, she feel asleep, and once, when she was half-awake, she commented that she couldn't wait to see me tomorrow (meaning Monday) which I knew was very unlikely, as we would both be working during the day...I have grad school class tonight...and she is going to the Monday night ball game, with a old friend, because one of his co-workers bailed on him... and then she has to get ready for the trip. She also commented half-asleep, that I was the sweetest guy. SO...what do you think dummy did this morning? I went online to check email before I left the house..and she saw I was on, and then off... so she called (I know perfect time for no contact...Sorry I missed guys) so dummy here asks her if she was talking to me when she said she couldn't wait to see "me." She said, I wasn't expecting to see you...so no it probably wasn't you, unless I was dreaming about you...she said it could be the new guy...or the old friend she is going to see tonight for the first time in a while. Of course, it smarted a little, but I asked for it...she said, I told you to not overreact to things I say when I am really sleepy or half-awake...

She then told me she was hoping nothing tainted the trip this week..and how much she needed to focus on the relationship. She commented that she will always feel like I had a part in her break up with her fiance. She said she was not blaming me, it wasn't my fault...but my continual comments had a negative effect in one way or another...and she didn't want that this time... That made me feel sad, and teary eyed....for my father and a married female friend had warned me that she was going to hold it against me...or have some resentment over my comments about her relationship. So...I really realized this morning that if I am going to talk to her..I need to keep negative comments about their relationship to myself...and express them to friends or family... In fact, I told her this morning, that I realized I needed to stop making comments about her relationship... that I should be supportive as her friend...and not carry my agenda... That I can't make her change her mind...it will either happen or it won't...

She told me she really is excited about the trip..because she hasn't been "taken" anywhere in a long time...

[crazydawg]

what the **** are you still doing man. Your a sorry excuse for a man. I swear i thought i was a wimp i finally realize that i'm not the worst case scenario.
Man believe it or not. WOMEN DO NOT WANT NICE GUYS. PAY ATTENTION STOP SWEATING HER. LEAVE HER ALONE. ONE LASST TIME WOMEN CAN SAY WHATEVER THEY WANT. THEY SAY YOUR A NICE GUY. ITS OVER.

[Wellnowuknow]

Boys are so dumb your never going to figure us out stop trying...

[jerryinva]

Actually, we had a very interesting conversation this afternoon. I learned that many of the things that family and friends have advised me...were/are true. She has never considered the possibility of us being together seriously...because she has so many negative memories of us over the last two years. She said she can barely remember how things were when we first met...because there has been such turmoil. She said the 5 or 6 days, she has felt closer to me, than she has in a while. She said if only I had listened to her when we were dating...and she asked for space...who knows how it might have ended up. She said she was really making a point, when she said how can I believe that you would make a good mate, when you can't even treat me well as a friend...and criticizing her relationship choices, and the like, is not treating her well. I don't believe that we will ever get back together as a couple...but I wish I listened to the advice...and there is no one to blame but me....

[jerryinva]

And boys are not dumb...we just can't figure women out....