[notloved504]

[color=blue][/color] HELP!!!!!!!!! SOMEONE PLEASE HELP ME!!!!!!! I DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO ANYMORE AND I CANT GET RID OF THIS FEELING IN MY HEART.
I HAVE BEEN DATING MY G/F FOR ABOUT 3 MONTHS NOW AND THE PAST TWO MONTHS NOW THINGS HAVE STARTED TO REALLY GO DOWN HILL. I HAVE STARTED TO FALL OUT OF LOVE WITH HER AND I DONT FEEL THE LOVE AND AFFECTION FROM HER THAT SHE ONCE HAD FOR ME.

FOR SOME REASON LATELY SHE THINKS I AM HIDING SOMETHING FROM HER. I DONT KNOW HOW I COULD HIDE SOMETHING FROM HER WHEN SHE IS ALWAYS AROUND ME OR ALWAYS ON THE PHONE WITH ME. WHEN SOMETHING IS WRONG WITH ME I TELL HER WHY I FEEL UPSET OR WHATEVER MOOD I AM IN. WHEN SHE IS SAD OR UPSET ITS LIKE PULLING TEETH ONLY I GET ANSWERS LIKE " YOU'LL NEVER UNDERSTAND" OR " DONT WORRY ABOUT IT"

WHAT SHE DOESNT UNDERSTAND IS THAT I HAVE BEEN THROUGH ALOT OF HORRIBLE RELATIONSHIPS. MY PAST RELATIONSHIPS HAVE ALWAYS ENDED UP WITH MY G/F EITHER LIEING TO ME OR CHEATING ON ME OR BOTH.

CAN ANYONE HELP ME FIGURE OUT WHY I DONT FEEL LIKE SHE GIVES A DAMN ABOUT ME ANYMORE. AND WHY I DONT LOVE HER AS MUCH AS I USED TO ANYMORE?

THANKS IN ADVANCE FOR EVERYONES HELP.

[ojibwaywmn]

Problems began after the first month into the relationship? You both came into it with emotional challenges. Perhaps you were hoping that she would "save" you from your past? Now you are seeing that she isn't the one. That's okay, you did nothing wrong.

What is important is YOU. I know what it is like to be cheated on and lied to. Forever, I thought it meant that I wasn't worthy of a good relationship, that I wasn't worthy to be happy. But I am working to change that around. And you can too. S****y things happen to everyone. It's how we learn. I read somewhere "nothing in this life has any meaning except the meaning that we give it". I know how difficult it is NOT to think about painful experiences. Now I ask myself "What can I get out of this? How come I am placing my worthiness into other people's hands? What can I do to change this around?" It takes time but I found that it is easing some anxieties and fears within myself.

It's not ideal to dwell on "not loving her". It appears that you care about her more than deep love. Nothing wrong with that. In the meantime, take care of yourself.

[notloved504]

i wasnt hoping she would save me from my past. i was hoping she would be different from my past. before her i was single for 4 yrs and i was fine. thank you for your advice and i agree with you about me caring more for her then just deep love.