[TommyGirl]

A brief recap of my story: Me and ex-fiancee broke up 5 months ago. We were together for 2+ years. He's been doing all the contacting since then. Recently he sent me an email saying "that there is noone else in the world, that will treat me like he did, also saying that I deserve the best, and he is one of the best men in the world, and that he knows that good men are hard to find."

The reason why he wrote me that was because, he always asks, "do I miss him", "do I think about him", "Am I over him." And he always asks about my personal life. He wants to know if there is any one in my life, and are they treating me right.

His mother asked him, if he felt that he still loved me, he missed me alot sometimes, and that he doesn't want me to be with nobody, then why won't he try to get my back, he said "it's not like that, and I'm just not for her. "

He still has a girlfriend, and I don't think that it is fair to her that he ask and tells me this stuff, because he is not the cheating kind. SO I dunno what to think right now. I just see noone caring that much for nobody.

[Barby]

You shouldn't tell him your personal information...he has moved on and you have a right to do the same.

It isn't fair to you for him to give you false hope (if you still have feelings for him) by saying that no one will treat you as well as he did. Also if he doesn't want to be with you he shouldn't be concerning himself with who you date or how they treat you.

My advice to you is to move on and don't have much contact with him, date again if you want to and be happy.

[TommyGirl]

Thanks so much for your reply! i have been waiting all day for someone to reply and you did! Your reply made me and the other people around me feel like we weren't the crazy ones. We know that this situation is defintely not normal. Thank you.

Any more opinions?

I guess there's good news and bad news, Tommygirl. I think he's still attracted to you and feels possessive about you. He must have fairly strong feelings about you to continue to pursue you like this and try to dissuade you from seeing other guys. But his actions have to be considered, too. He's with someone else and shows no signs of leaving. It's selfish of him to want to keep you on hold, and it's mean of him to use you for an ego boost when he's got a new girlfriend. He's looking for reassurance that he hasn't completely lost you, but this is unfair, since he's giving you nothing real in return. Tell him you won't do it anymore. And then take some time to yourself to recover and move on.

I think a little of this is okay after a break-up--the "I still love you" period of recovery. It's comforting. But this sounds really one-sided, and it will keep you wanting someone you can't have.

[TommyGirl]

Thanks Velveteel for your reply! I think you are right in both cases, it's sad to me that he would try to use me, because I thought he was not the type to use somebody like that, but oh well.