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please help...wedding in 3 months...everyone is ill...dont know what to do?

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Getting Married Cold feet to pre-marital stressors--the place to discuss all the issues that come with saying "I do."

Old 22nd July 2004, 12:12 PM   #1
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Red face please help...wedding in 3 months...everyone is ill...dont know what to do?

I am currently in the middle of planning my wedding (which is in three months). Not a huge wedding, nor expensive (about $1,500). I am so insanely stressed out. I have been engaged for the past three months and in the past 6 weeks i have gotten a whole slue of bad news.

Everyone in my immediate family is dying or becoming permanitly crippled. I have 5 immediate family members (all people who raised me and whom i have known most my life) parents, grandparent, foster parents. every single one of them is ill. one has cancer, one has conjestive heart syndrome and diabeties (which i allready lost one loved one to), one has parkinsons, an irrepariable fracture in his spine that will eventually cause him to be paralized, blindness and a stroke, one just suffered some wierd infection in her ankle that means she can hardly take 2 steps on her own ever again and she now has to be on oone of those carry around iv units permanitly, and one of old age.

i feel helpless since i am in another state and cannot be with them physically, nor do i have the means to send them money. the one with parkinsons can no longer afford his meds because the government is taking so ****ing long approving his case for medical assistance.

also, i am currently going through a major transition at work that has recently ment long hours (60ish a week) and i am planning my wedding (which is in three months).

i dont know what to do. i dont sleep anymore...and if i do im only ever half asleep. i cant keep food down and i constantly hurt.

part of me wnats to neglect everything but work and them and just earn enough to fly there every couple of weeks to help as much as i can...but the other part of me realizes that my wedding will probablly be the last "family function" i get to spend with them. my grandma cant come because she isnt well enough to travel...so i will be heading out her way soon and frequently. and i am paying for one of them to be here.

i have no idea what i can do to help them, how i can help if i am stressed out as much as i am, nor do i know what to do about the wedding.

any advice?
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Old 22nd July 2004, 12:29 PM   #2
She's Come Undone
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Do all of these people close to you live in the same area?

Not as you, but each other?
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You got hit by a freight train because you walked onto the tracks and stood there and let it hit you.

I planted some bird seed. A bird came up. Now I don't know what to feed it.
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