[sillly402]

Well here it is - My Girl friend of seven years ( on and off for seven years ) Moved out last week. I know we love each other very much. Last time I saw her she was crying like a baby - not sure she is doing the right thing. I'm hurting real bad right now. I know our releationship was not the best, but I think it could be fixxed. I did the whole baby don't leave thing. Now It has been 4 days since I last heard from her. I'm not sure if there is anyone else. She did leave once befor we she meet someone. The only lasted about a month. I guess I know i should do the N/c thing. Most of her things are still here, she only took what she need.

I'm lost right now. Yes I want her back. I love this women very much.
she is 28
I am 33

Any feedback would be great

thanks

[EC]

Why the break up though why did she leave?

[sillly402]

She was not happy anymore. Things were not great. When I talked to her about some happy times we had just a few weeks ago. she just gives me a funny look. She has never truely been a happy person to begin with. has been through eating dissorder, father never loved her. sexual abuse as a child.

[aunnierah]

i was her at one time and sometimes we feel we need you to beg sounds bad but if you do she will know you love her and want to work things out.if you truly love her then go tell her tell her to come home so you can work things out men know what they want and express them selves differently like they don't tell or show there emotions as us women do we tell everything we need to be reminded thats all and another thing is we don't know if we made the right decision because we feel hurt in are hearts because we life are life's loving with are hearts hope this helps and wishing you the best of luck

[sillly402]

So your saying I should go and see her - Tell her again how much i love - and that i think we can work this out?

what if i get the big no? i not sure it would hurt anymore then i'm hurting now?

[aunnierah]

you need to tell her your feelings and if you tell her and she does want you and feels she's made a mistake she will come home just be honest and tell her that truth of all your feelings always and now

[sillly402]

I think i did that. I know she was thinking about it - she told me she talked to her mom about her maybe not doing the right thing, by leaving. we were a bit upset when this was going on. i know where she - i think i could talk to her a without us both falling apart now.


if you think it's worth a chance.

I love her - what do i have to loss

[sillly402]

We have been trying to work things out for the last week or so. It seems as if I'm the one doing all the work. I took her to a counsuler. we have to go again next week. She said she is still in love with me and wants to work things out. She spends the weekends at the beach with her friends. She says she's scared we will just fall back into our old patterns, and wants to take things slow. Two weeks ago she was a mess all she wanted was me back. Did not care about going to the shore or anything but me. Now she is all standoffish. Like she just needed to know I was still there for her. She says there is no other guy. I belive her.

She told me it was getting harder and harder being without me.

Should I hang in until the end of summer?

[aunnierah]

well i can say that a break up is not fun and trying to go slow when it seems we want to just jump back in and we cant for them and maby are selves.I can say its hard to hold back your feelings I am going through this my self but i just give my boy frien his space Its hard to start over and there are alot of things you have to hold on too and just let life gide you i guess when i try too hard i dont seem to get what i want out of the reason i tryed in the first place i feel and see if i wait his feeling will come back all by them selves.its hard tho i want to rush back to the way we used to be but there is a trust thing for my man...........i also would feel better if thing where just the way they where but its a new start alot of confusion but i pray things will work out in the long run remember we have to work hard to get what we want but dont try so hard that you scair the outher person away and just try to talk .....talking is the best then you both know where you are in your realationship hope things work out let me know how things go ....................trust in yourself

[sillly402]

You are so right, I want things back the way they were. But the way they were did not work for us. She is right we need to take things slow. We have talked about things a lot. maybe to much. I told her everything. Things I never told her before. She cheated once a few years ago. I never let go of that. I know now I need to if we are to move forward. Me not trusting her was a big part of this brake-up.

I'm a guy I have a hard time talking about my feelings. But I am doing it now. I love this girl. She needed to know that. I never let her know just how much she means to me. I did not want her to think she could ever hurt me. Now I know I was just hurting her. I told her I was sorry. I will tell you what, if she can open up and let me in, I will do everything I can every day to let her know how much I cherish her